US Customary Units

An utterly unusable "system" of random measuring references designed by Grok Einstein in the neolithic period (10,000 years BC). Adapted by Egyptians and "refined" in 3rd century Rome by people who bathe in urine, drink wine from lead goblets and think it's ok to have sex with 10 year old boys. Eventually abandoned by every other nation on the planet earth in favor of a rational, logical, interrelated and vastly easier measuring system called "the metric system" with the only exception being the United States of America who wistfully wait for the rest of the world to see the error of their ways and re-embrace a kings cock and 3 grains of barley as a glorious and Godly base for units of measure.

"We wouldn't have crashed a 200 million dollar Mars probe into the surface of the plant if we would've stuck to using pure, divinely inspired US Customary Units"

by MortyFoonbang June 30, 2020

parental units

the people who are also known as your parents, who make you feel like they are in control and know everything. you feel like a little dum fuk because they follow you around in the mall or somewhere and act like parents - REAL PARENTS - beware of these units .. they are bad. . bad bad bad.. .

Jon: want to go to the mall Ed?
Ed: i can't, my parental units will follow behind..
Jon: that blows

by !kelso May 28, 2005

p-units

Abbreviation for parental units, or more simply put, parents.

I'm going shopping with my p-units so I don't have to spend my own money.

by Meli Jet February 28, 2011

heathen units

How some people from the USA (United States of Assholery) call the far superior measuring units of the metric system, because they are that insecure.

Nice European fellow - For this recipe, you will need two hundred grams of flour.
Mean Inbred American Redneck - Grams? Get em drug dealer heathen units outta here, boy. Here in 'Murica we use freedom units. So start talking ounces, boy.

by EuropeanMike September 21, 2017

shift some units

Slingin some hardcore drugs. Any bloke you see wearing his speedies outside centerlink with a bumbag hanging over his puffed out chest is sure to be

Hey bro want to go chase some gangas tomorrow arvo?

Cant bruz, rent is due, gotta go shift some units

by dingas4lyf August 5, 2016

A group of ABSOLUTE UNITS

A group of ABSOLUTE UNITS is called a troop

Chuck- “DAMN look at that troop!”
Bill- “What’s a troop?”
Chuck- “It’s a group of ABSOLUTE UNITS!”

by Dababy’s baby October 18, 2019

Emotional Units (EU's)

Emotional Units: (also known as EU's) aggravation, anger, sadness, or rage as measured in non specific units, or as a measure of personal energy. Shorthand for a problem or issue that is consuming a lot of attention , usually in a relationship.

"I'm not going to spend Emotional Units (EU's) on your ex-boyfriend anymore."

by Westlnguy June 20, 2009