Jerk

A guy who meets three or more of the following criteria:
-He has a submissive, ditzy girlfriend who is obsessed with him because he treats her like dirt
-He thinks he's the sexiest thing on the planet, and thus thinks anyone who is NOT "the sexiest thing on the planet" is his inferior
-Swear words make up a third of his vocabulary
-He is at the gym all the time, but he doesn't go there for excercise; he goes there to show off his "guns" to all the other gymgoers, who could really care less how much he can bench press
-He refers to himself in third person
-He took his facebook profile picture without a shirt on
-His idea of comedy is anything involving the word "dick"
-He thinks smoking, drinking, and/or doing drugs makes him even cooler
-He skips class all the time because he hates anything mentally challenging
-Someone else does his homework for him
-His group of friends consists solely of other jerks, because he thinks people who aren't jerks are nerds, and no one else wants to be his friend anyway
-The number of girls he is dating is higher than his IQ

In the following scenario, one of the individials is a jerk. See if you can spot which one.
Jake: Hey, Chad. I did your homework again, but you didn't show up for class... where were you?
Chad: Fuck that shit. The Chad went to the gym to show his sweet abs to all the bitches there. Later, dick-nerd. Heh heh... dick.
Jake: What a jerk...
by Enigmatical September 05, 2010
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Jerk

a contemptibly obnoxious person or someone who is incredibly rude and disgusting.
by Α January 13, 2022
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Jerk

A selfish fool jack-ass
A: She broke up with me even though I left my girl for her
B: What a jerk!
by Anonymously_Anonymous August 18, 2021
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jerk

The third derivative of distance with respect to time; the rate of change of acceleration.
"What's the derivative of jerk?"
"Uh... asshole?"
by Pedant April 24, 2005
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jerk

Is what Ry Bleckel is when you date him and text him ily. He'll get pissed and say that you don't have a right to tell him you love him because you barely know him. Even though you've known eachother for about a year and are actually in a relationship. Then believe it or not, he'll break up with you right after and block you on all social media accounts. All because of a text message "ily."
Ex-girlfriend: "Did you hear about what Ry did last night?"
Friend: "Yes! He is such a jerk."
by Hawaii.x.bae May 13, 2015
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jerk

In medival Europe,masturbation was considered to be on the brink of insanity. So as an insult, people would call each other "jerk-offs", and soon, jerk was enough to get the point across.
by only$19.99,less s+h December 27, 2003
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jerk

Chris Rogers spent all nite jerking it. Word 2 ya mutha!
by Pencil Thin Mustache October 17, 2003
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