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alphabetical alternatives

An A-Z list of "non-standard" objects or activities:
AWLternative: A different tool/method for line-scribing and hole-piercing.

BALLternative: Something other than a "bouncy sphere" for kids to play with.
BAWLternative: Doing something besides loud tearful carrying-on.
CALLternative: Any socializing-activity other than a teenage-girl's typical favorite.
CAWlternative: Yes, crows are indeed handsome and smart, but let's look at some other feathered friends, as well.
DOLLternative: A less gender-based toy for young girls.
EALternative: Teaching something other than English as a "second language".

FALLternative: Anything besides tumbling outta da Ugly Tree.
GALLternative: (1) An attitude other than temerity. (2) Less-destructive methods to avoid surface-abrasion damage.
HALLternative: Architecture not employing passageways.
IAlternative: A designation other than feminine.
JAWlternative: Anything besides flappin' yer gums, so dat others can have a little peace and quiet!
LAWlternative: When Steve Lehto speaks about a non-legal topic on YouTube.
MAlternative: Handing a problem yourself and instead of always just yelling for your mummy.
MAWlternative: Any activity dat avoids getting near da powerful chompers of a greedy/voracious animal.
NAWlternative: Any response other than just a flat "negatory".
OAlternative: A different treatment-approach to food-binging besides boring weekly meetings.
PALLternative: Cremation or other burial-procedure not involving a coffin.
More examples of alphabetical alternatives:
PAULternative: Anything not involving everyone's favorite giant lumberjack.
PAWlternative: (1) Anything dat doesn't involve an animal's furry foot. (2) Problem-solving on your own, without always yelling for yer Daddy.
QUAlternative: Any topic not referring to "in the capacity or character of".
RAWlternative: Zheesh, you back-to-nature hippie-freak --- have a little cooked food once in a while!
SAULternative: Seeking da judgement/wisdom of someone other than a tempestuous spear-thrower.
SAWlternative: Letting a tree remain standing.
TALLternative: Consulting a short-to-medium-height person.
UAlternative: Approaching a film-studio other than da MGM-owned giant.
VAULTernative: What da bad guys in da 1971 caper-film "Dollars" should have utilized for storing their ill-gotten loot.
WALLternative: What "Da Donald" should have sought much earlier than now for excluding illegal Mexican immigrants.
WALTERnative: What Achmed should seek for advice/fellowship, since said crabby ol' fart scares da crap outta him.
XAlternative" Pertaining to something other than finance or da stock market.
YAlternative: Anything other than a straight-positive response.
YAWlternative: Movement other than directional-rotation, such as pitch and roll.
YAWLternative: Any wind-driven boat other than da dainty "triangle-shaped sail array" design.
ZAlternative: Any culinary section other than da classic disk-shaped Italian flatbread.
by QuacksO March 17, 2020
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alphabetical opportunities

bopportunity: A chance to clonk someone's noggin.
copportunity: An occasion when you can dial 9-1-1.
fopportunity: An area or event where you can dress up excessively or outlandishly.
GOPportunity: A time when you can openly flaunt your Republican viewpoints.
hopportunity: A safe/acceptable location to do jumping-jacks and leapfrogging.
lopportunity: When you notice that your ornamentals are getting too bushy and/or scraggly.
mopportunity: A chance to try out your new Swiffer.
popportunity: When you come across a discarded sheet of bubble-wrap.
sopportunity: An occasion where you can either easily/inexpensively appease someone, or absorb a liquid with a sponge.
topportunity: A chance to "do somebody one better" in a contest or impromptu session of friendly verbal sparring.
wopportunity: A time when you can make derogatory remarks about Italians.
Alphabetical opportunities may be fun to think about, but most of them seem largely pointless to perform in real life.
by QuacksO July 13, 2020
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alphabeticalxd

One of the funniest twitter accounts on twitter dot com. Would recommend to follow it.
"Have you seen Alphabeticalxd's new post?? it' hilarious!!!"
by FloRider17 December 6, 2020
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alphabetical estimates

bestimate: Da closest-to-reality guess you can make regarding probable cost, amount, etc.

blestimate: An approximate guess of how much divine intervention you're likely to need from "Da Great One" to get you outta a debacle.
breastimate: What you make about da size or other attributes of a gal's ta-ta's just by looking at how far her blouse or bikini sticks out in da front.
guestimate: What da maitre'd needs to be good at making so as to know how many places to set at da table.

jestimate: What you fervently hope a contractor is making when he quotes you some astronomical figure.
Pestimate: Refers to either (1) about how many unwanted creatures dat you think currently are or will be present in a given locale at a certain time, or (2) how bratty you expect day some whiny spoiled ankle-biter will act on a particular occasion.
Restimate: Approximately how long you'll be able to crash before tackling some arduous/unpleasant task.
Testimate: A good guess regarding how long, difficult, etc. dat an upcoming exam is gonna be.
Vestimate: Da possible attributes, quality, style, etc. of a sleeveless upper-body garment.
Westimate: What you hafta do when navigating without a compass.
Yestimate: How positively someone is likely to react when asked for permission, favors, etc.
Zestimate: How enthusiastic someone is likely to be about a situation, undertaking, etc.
I suppose dat alphabetical estimates are fun too think about, but it's always wise to have a better idea regarding something important than just a ballpark guess.
by QuacksO December 17, 2020
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alphabetical attributes

BATtributes: Details of either a wooden baseball-whacker, or a flying cave-dweller.
CATtributes: Da specifics of Mr. Furry-Purry.
DATtributes: Da performance-specs of 21st-century audio-recording.
FATtributes: How overweight someone is, and whether it's due to overeating, junk food, or a medial condition.
GATTributes: Details of da infamous international-commerce accord which was much-frowned-upon by many countries.
HATtributes: Da appearance, fit, and quality of head-wear.
KATtributes: Da ingredients, size/weight, and texture/taste of da famous red-wrapped candy-bar.
LATTE-ributes: How good your cup of milky espresso was.
MATTE-ributes: Details of a non-glossy painting.
Other examples of alphabetical attributes are:
NATtributes: Da appearance and personality of Daniel McCormick's pint-sized side-kick in "Forever Young".
PATtributes: Da dimensions of a slab of butter, Trish's particular qualities, or da delightfulness-level of gentle palm-bounces on someone's shoulder or head.

RATtributes: Da anatomical details of everyone's least-favorite rodent.
SATtributes: How someone rests on his butt, or da perceived difficulty/fairness of school-exams.
TATtributes: How Madea defines her temper-management issues ("I'm not angry; I'm just gettin' da gotters!")
VATtributes: Details regarding a large laboratory-basin.
WATTributes: Da voltage and current of da "angry pixies" in an electrical circuit.
by QuacksO February 24, 2021
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alphabetic attributes

'Stats 'n' specs of various items, in A-Z order:
AAttributes: Da minutes of your last sobriety meeting.
BATtributes: Details of either (1) baseball-whacking devices or (2) winged cave-dwelling mammals (bonus fact --- they are **not** blind!)
CATtributes: Da specifics of what makes Garfield tick.
DATtributes: Da nitty-gritty about modern recording-cassettes.
EATtributes: How someone stuffs his face.
FATtributes: Similar to da previous definition, except dat it measures how obese said face-stuffer gets from his debauched gluttony.
GATTributes: Da specifics of da infamous "free 'n' fair worldwide commerce" resolution.
HATtributes: Da fussy details about your headwear.
JATtributes: Da unique culture of northeast-area inhabitants of India and Pakistan.
KATTributes: Da airing-schedule and programming-themes of da OKC-based FM radio station.
LATTributes: Da main plot of da famous "cute doggies nibbling da same strand of spaghetti" animated movie.
MATtributes: Da make/model, dimensions, color, texture, firmness, etc. of yer exercise-pad.
More examples of alphabetic attributes include:
NATtributes: What makes Nathan his own unique self.
OATtributes: Da quality and price of da grain dat you feed your hoofed-and-maned friend in da back yard.
PATtributes: Specifics of either (1) when/how ya administer soothing/affectionate "laying on of hands", or (2) what's special about your Irish guy/gal-pal.
QATtributes: Da appearance, growing-method, uses, etc. of da euphoria-producing flowering plant from Ethiopia.
RATtributes: How Mr. Mole's best friend lives and thinks.
SATtributes: Describes how students are forced to plant their butts for long periods to take a stupid end-of-term exam.
TATtributes: Da "getting even" specifics dat Madea describes to Dr. Phil during their infamous "getters gettin' got" dialogue.
VATtributes: Da dimensions, volume/capacity, etc. of large open-topped storage/processing tubs.

WATTributes: Describes da quality/quantity of da angry pixies supplied by da power company.
XATtributes: What a specific totem pole looks like, and da history behind it.
YATtributes: Da unique qualities of New Orleans accents.
ZATtributes: Za zhortcut of zaying, "Is that".
by QuacksO March 24, 2021
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alphabetical documentaries

Assorted historical-entertainment productions, arranged in A-Z order:
BLOCumentary: Details of assorted common-goal groups
BLOCKumentary: All about cube-shaped objects
BOCKumentary: History of dark-beer brewing
COCKumentary: History of how lucky you got wif da fairer gender
CLOCKumentary: Details how da set for Doc Brown's laboratory was created
CROCKumentary: An expose of BS, or presents a timeline of how stoneware has evolved over da millennia

DOCKumentary: Tells about boat-piers from over da years
FLOCKumentary: All about warmth-linings, or "birds of a feather" social-behavior
FROCKumentary: Details fancy-schmancy dress-up duds for kiddos
GLOCKumentary: Discusses how Madea deals with "getters" who "done got" her
HOCKumentary: Expounds on topics regarding pawn-shops or leg-joints
JOCKumentary: History of athletes
KNOCKumentary: All about door-tapping and da related highly-popular pun-type jokes
LOCHumentary: Tells about inland waterways and ocean inlets
LOCKumentary: Details of hair-styles or mechanical exclusionary devices
MOCKumentary: A spoof on a genuine educational film
Additional examples of alphabetical documentaries might include:
NOCKumentary: All about archery
POCKumentary: How small dents are created
ROCKumentary: Educates viewers about minerals, thumpy-thump music, or tipsy chairs
SOCKumentary: All you need to know about cloth foot-coverings

SHOCKumentary: A really startling/dramatic educational film
SMOCKumentary: Da history of outer garments worn for protective/decorative purposes
SPOCKumentary: A biography of everyone's favorite logical-minded spaceman
STOCKumentary: All about farm-animals, long-gun butts, or Wall Street trading
TOCKumentary: Companion-episode to a TICKumentary
WALKumentary: All about gettin' up off'n yer lazy fat a** and "hoofin' it" sometimes, instead of always riding in a vehicle
WOKumentary: Da assorted details and attributes of Chinese cookin'
by QuacksO April 10, 2021
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