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The Hammer of Thor

A form of Cock and Ball Torture where one is strapped naked outside during a thunderstorm and has a lightning rod inserted into the urethra. Should a bolt of lightning strike it, they achieve the power of Thor.
Simp 1: “bruh my girl is gonna give me The Hammer of Thor if it rains tonight.”
Simp 2: “don’t fucking talk to me dude.”
by Monkey Shagger May 1, 2020
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Hammering the Beets

Male masturbation. Typically, the more vigorous and rough variety. Not just a causal wank.
I walked in on my roommate sitting on the toilet hammering the beets. I wondered what the smacking was.

My uncle paid me $50 to let him watch me hammering the beets.

I’m so sore from hammering the beets. My balls are swollen. I was on pornhub all day.
by Dick Onchin September 23, 2020
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Bitch Hammer

The hammer I kill bitches with. Any device or means to shut a bitch the fuck up! An over the top reply to the nagging bitch that is always present. An all purpose cock that always gets the job done.
"When Barrack finally grew tired of that dykes complaints over sexism he dropped the bitch hammer on her."
"Michele Bachman needs to be nailed with a bitch hammer"
"Every time that cunt opens her mouth I either reach for my cock or the bitch hammer to shut her up."
"No one could stand Amy's friend Rachel until Adam grudge fucked her with a bitch hammer.
by Scarcazim October 9, 2013
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hammer bat

presumably a crude mix between, obviously, a bat and a hammer, which would essentially have the same general function as either a bat or a hammer, with slight aesthetic variation.

also the last thing you want to see in your google feed when looking for help with a missing hammer.bat file.
Dennis: "Dude, check this out. Stay with me here, what if someone made a hammer... bat..."
Quincy: "Shut up, Dennis."
Dennis: "I'm gonna do it."

Google: "What? He actually did it? This deserves two full pages, at least."
4chan: "Shut up, Google."
Google: "Get a search bar."
4chan: "Never."
Steam: "Holy shit. You guys, someone actually made a hammer bat."
Troll: "Whoever is writing this needs to shut up."
Steam: "That is hilarious, who named this hammer.bat? You, James? You get a raise."

Quincy: "..."
Dennis: "Dude, I TOLD you. HAMMERBAT bro. hammer. bat."
Quincy: "Oh my GOD, and you're STILL talking about it."
Dennis: "hammerrrre batito."
Quincy: "Fuck you, dude, the hammer bat is still stupid."
Dennis: "Dude, you are so jealous! You're jealous of the hammer bat!"
Quincy: "No..."
Dennis: "Oh you're not jealous?"
Quincy: "Absolutely not!"
Dennis: "You're not jealous of the three pages in google when you type in hammer bat?"
Quincy: "Oh come on, you don't have to look it up now... Jesus."
Dennis: "Three pages. They call that a hat trick, son. A hammer bat trick... Patrick."
Quincy: "You can't even type, you typed in 'hammer.bat', you fool. You absolute fool!"
Dennis: "Oh my god, it's fine, Quincy, see? It still comes up with the hammer bat. Three pages, boys . Read 'em and weep."
Quincy: "Oh my god, shut UP, Dennis."
by hawkjames October 14, 2013
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Warm Hammer

Deliberately and repeatedly hitting your lady in the eye with your member.
Yo dawg, my bitch was giving me shit everyday. Everyday. Until I gave her the warm hammer.
by Warm Hammer PhD. August 15, 2011
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charles the hammer

that pimpin' French guy who kicked muslims out of france.
he delivered an ass- kicking like charles the hammer! damn!

If Thor was human he'd use charles' hammer.
by nexapparatus33 October 20, 2011
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Hammer Long

Hammer Long is the name of a song by French Montana. No one really knows why the song is called that.

The term can also be used in situations when someone is tired or overworked. Commonly used as an expression.
"Hey man! How was work?"

"Dude it was crazy! I had to stay an extra hour and didn't get overtime pay! Fuckin ridiculous!"

"Wow.... Hammer Long......"
by HammerLooooong March 19, 2023
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