hands-down winner

Humorous term for a gal who is an "easy shoo-in" victor over a lustful-for-boobs dude who is trying to lift said chick's shirt off over her head; da gal's super-effective top-removal-thwarting strategy is to simply keep her arms lowered instead of obligingly raising them up over her head.

Even if a lady is a hands-down winner at keeping you from getting her naked from the waist up, you can still access her chest-pillows by either raising her shirt just as high as her arm-pits, or simply reaching up underneath the hem of her shirt and cupping her boobs from there.

by QuacksO November 25, 2021

Functional marginalized whiner

A black kid that never once got their ass whooped as a kid, but somehow all they can talk about is how much harder it is to be them than it is to have lighter (especially pale) skin (usually to try and walk over or manipulate people that experience has taught them tend to be easier to manipulate than their own people).

All the functional marginalized whiner did was complain about how immature and dysfunctional all these so called privileged whites got to be, if only he/she could act that way like he/she wished for as a kid (as the stereotype goes, all the blond kids were having all the fun).

by The Original Agahnim December 8, 2021

Functional marginalized whiner

A black kid that never got their ass whooped by an authority figure (such as a parent) as a kid, then they get out into the world where not everybody has to be nice or refrain from cursing all the time and all of a sudden it's harder to be them than it is to be anybody (especially somebody with lighter skin/hair).

Nobody ever picked on the functional marginalized whiner, instead people usually picked on people they thought were easier targets, people with lighter skin and hair, people that seemed more childish and fucked up, people that didn't seem as together.

by The Original Agahnim December 8, 2021

Choose a winner

Doesn't work, Never works, It will never work.

Choose a winner

by quartz89_alt March 17, 2022

Scratch-Off Winner

A term used when you're fingering a girl, flicking her bean, making everything work fast and hard enough, and then she squirts and convulses. It's like winning a lottery scratch-off ticket—not a big win, but enough to keep playing the game.

Nick: Hey Bill, you get with Dirty Suzie last night?
Bill: Let's just say when I was fingering her, she must have felt like I had a Kennedy Half-Dollar on me as she made me a Scratch-Off Winner. She melted off the couch after two minutes. Smell my fingers (Bill thrusts his fingers onto Nick's nasal area mockingly).
Nick (awkwardly smelling Bill's fingers): Damn....Let me lick that shit!

by Studs Lonigan III December 5, 2024