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Asda Toilets

A place many feel sorry for because it repeatedly gets filled with Hill Biscuits by Hooligans. These Hooligans also tend to dump on the shitty Hill Biscuits and not flush.
DAD: What have you been doing lately?

MONK: Well, there were too many Hill Biscuits in the SNUF Bag so I bogged em in the Asda toilets and shat on em.
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Toilet Sausage

A slang term used to refer to going to the bath and taking a poop, dump, crap,deuce, and ext.

The act of a human making a sausage shaped poop/turd and depositing the poop/turd into the toilet.
"That pizza has gone right threw me. I have to go make some toilet sausage."
by Secrect Destroyer February 8, 2009
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toilet paper eggs

the curled up bits of toilet paper left in your bum hairs after you wipe too hard with cheap toilet paper after a shit
Ah man, that bog roll has left me with toilet paper eggs in my ass nest..

Bev was not impressed by his dads new tattoo, so he dropped his duds to give his dad a brown eye and his dad said "damn boy, you got toilet paper eggs hatching in your anus"
by Katey Kate Kat Ka K March 10, 2014
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Toilet Seat

Noun. The left over hair on a male head after the balding process is complete. The hair on the back and sides of the head.
"Wow! I haven't seen Bob in years! He's got a full blown toilet seat!
by Domenico Tavella September 26, 2006
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More ass than a toilet seat

Implying that this "pimp" get's more action than you could ever imagine. Often used by poseurs, and white people that can't rap.* Perfect comeback- You get as much ass as a urinal. Snap.

*Just kidding.
<Idiot> Your gay.
<Not an idiot> You've probably never even made out with anyone.
<Idiot> You kiddin'? I get more ass than a toilet seat.
<Not an idiot> Yeah, right. You get as much ass as a urinal.
<Idiot> Your gay.
by Sw0rdPh1sh September 11, 2006
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Toilet cough

The sound a toilet makes when you take a very large dump. After flushing the toilet, it can not handle it and all the water runs out, the overworked crapper makes a coughing sound as it tries to pass your recent donation.
I was sitting in the stall this morning and the guy next to me must be eating too much brand. He flushed and the toilet coughed like it was dying, like an old man with TB.
by Manshoon July 13, 2009
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toilet material

Any material used while defecating on the toilet. Can be a magazine, shampoo bottle, or a book. This material is usually pointless, but makes for good reading while doing number 2.
Hey Joe, hand me that toilet material ( while pointing at the back of a vhs case).
by ihihihih January 14, 2010
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