Jan-Malte is a guy, typically looking for a German guy (blonde hair and the most beautiful bluish eyes). You can usually find Jan-Malte sleeping, playing with animals or doing German things like drinking beer. He is a crazy good cook, but be careful because when he is cooking you are not allowed to touch anything in the kitchen. Anyway, the only thing you really want to touch is him because Jan-Malte is a hottie. He is mostly a laid back guy who you can enjoy life with.
by gabsyy January 8, 2025
Get the Jan-Malte mug.Dirty Malte
A sexual fetish where those bleeding from the anus experience a heightened orgasm while receiving anal sex and watching videos of Greta Thunberg’s climate change speech at the UN.
A sexual fetish where those bleeding from the anus experience a heightened orgasm while receiving anal sex and watching videos of Greta Thunberg’s climate change speech at the UN.
Woman - Babe my ass is bleeding… can you give me a Dirty Malte?
Man - I’d love to give you a Dirty Malte babe!
Man - I’d love to give you a Dirty Malte babe!
by Straya11 February 7, 2025
Get the Dirty Malte mug.The act of shiting oneself in fear so much that you can't retain control of your asshole and so little globs of malteser shaped poo come out uncontrollably.
by SebilCrostar August 7, 2025
Get the Puckering Maltesers mug.Darwinism in action? No I think Anti Vaxxers are an example Dunning Kruger Malthusianism. They see tried and tested disease prevention as deliberate infection.
by svenjamie March 22, 2020
Get the Dunning Kruger Malthusianism mug.To kill oneself using means of drugged sweets
To avoid a problem
A man gives you slightly warm maltesers and you question why they are warm
When you’re tired of a situation, the option is there
To avoid a problem
A man gives you slightly warm maltesers and you question why they are warm
When you’re tired of a situation, the option is there
Ah yeah, Johnny, did you not hear? He popped a malteser last week
This coffee shop makes me wanna pop a malteser
This coffee shop makes me wanna pop a malteser
by Barney_the_dinosaur November 23, 2021
Get the Pop a Malteser mug.When you giving yo girl head, but your head is.. her head? And then you make out but with your butts.
yooooooo, I gave Elishica The Sloppy Maltese the other day and she said "hey where tf did my head go SHIT HOW'D IT GET ON YUOR BODY D:"
by anonymous April 23, 2022
Get the the sloppy maltese mug.Definition: A so-called “South Asian music festival” in Malta where the plane ride over already looks like a Ryanair flight to Hell. Half off the fuddu’s from endz are there, armed with counterfeit LV man-bags, three spritzes of Sauvage, and a dream of piping someone else’s missus.
The mandem: Harpz, Yuvraj, and Gurj “VR6 swap” Sandhu are posted up by the pool, flexing topless in their Boss shorts, sipping Jameson like it’s a casual Tuesday night at the Prince of Wales. The girls: Simran, Nav, Preeti, and TikTok sensation wannabe Sharanjit, are lined up in PrettyLittleThing dresses that could be mistaken for dental floss, Snapchatting their nails while their man back home is refreshing her location on Snapchat.
By Day 2, every villa has turned into a Punjabi gangbang. Simran “just went for a shisha” but ended up on a sunlounger with three kanjars from Handsworth who took turns playing helicopter with their cocks in time to Sidhu Moose Wala remixes. Nav swore she was only going “to see the vibes” but got Eiffel Towered so many times by lads from Hounslow her passport photo doesn’t even look like her anymore. Meanwhile, the uncles back home are on Facebook typing: “Proud to see our youth breaking borders ✊🏽🔥” having no idea Preeti is right now is getting pipe’d with three Slough roadmen while someone live-streams it on Insta. If you let your girl go here, you are a certified fuddu. She’s not coming back tan - she’s coming back with PTSD flashbacks every time she hears a dhol.
The mandem: Harpz, Yuvraj, and Gurj “VR6 swap” Sandhu are posted up by the pool, flexing topless in their Boss shorts, sipping Jameson like it’s a casual Tuesday night at the Prince of Wales. The girls: Simran, Nav, Preeti, and TikTok sensation wannabe Sharanjit, are lined up in PrettyLittleThing dresses that could be mistaken for dental floss, Snapchatting their nails while their man back home is refreshing her location on Snapchat.
By Day 2, every villa has turned into a Punjabi gangbang. Simran “just went for a shisha” but ended up on a sunlounger with three kanjars from Handsworth who took turns playing helicopter with their cocks in time to Sidhu Moose Wala remixes. Nav swore she was only going “to see the vibes” but got Eiffel Towered so many times by lads from Hounslow her passport photo doesn’t even look like her anymore. Meanwhile, the uncles back home are on Facebook typing: “Proud to see our youth breaking borders ✊🏽🔥” having no idea Preeti is right now is getting pipe’d with three Slough roadmen while someone live-streams it on Insta. If you let your girl go here, you are a certified fuddu. She’s not coming back tan - she’s coming back with PTSD flashbacks every time she hears a dhol.
Breaking Borders Festival (Malta Edition) - Example (NSFW):
“Bro, why’s Rajni limping?”
“She went Malta for Breaking Borders.”
“…say no more. Gurj and Mandeep turned her into a wheel barrow.”
“Bro, why’s Rajni limping?”
“She went Malta for Breaking Borders.”
“…say no more. Gurj and Mandeep turned her into a wheel barrow.”
by BikBoiCoq September 3, 2025
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