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John Egbert 

A young man stands in his bedroom. It just so happens that today, the 13th of April, 2009, is this young man's birthday. Though it was thirteen years ago he was given life, it is only today he will be given a name!
Person 1: Yo, have you read Homestuck?
Person 2: Yeah!
Person 1: Which human is your favourite?
Person 2: Def John Egbert.
John Egbert by PoisIvy February 16, 2024
Related Words

John Trevor Gregory 

A mythical bing creature found in the depths of the bing community to summon use the phrase "Trump on top" or Dutton on top.
John Trevor stumpery Trump on top!.
John Trevor Gregory: ...

John Lewis Teaspoon 

The term to "John Lewis Teaspoon" someone is to go and purchase a brand new sparkly teaspoon from the local John Lewis store.
The spoon can only be purchased from a John Lewis store and cannot be from any other store.
Once purchased the purchaser uses the teaspoon to remove one eye from the targeted person using only the spoon. After the eye has been removed and only the socket remains, the person with the tea spoon has intercourse with the eye socket of the person lacking the eye.
Person 1 "Glen is such a pain in the arse"

Person 2 " Yeah, if he keeps it up I'm gonna John Lewis Teaspoon him"

Or

Person 1 "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO! IM GONNA JOHN LEWIS TEASPOON THE CRAP OUT OF YOU"

Person 2 "EEEEEK"
John Lewis Teaspoon by 969-696 February 19, 2024

John Trevor Gregory 

A scary man summoned by praising Dutton or Trump. He claps back with savage insults such as "Stump"

DONT CALL HIM JOHN TREVOR STUMPERY
You: TRUMP ON TOP
John Trevor Gregory: Stump
You: John Trevor Stumpery
John Trevor Gregory: STOP, STOP, STOP
the ww2 veteran who invented tacos on the uss texas
dude 1:mmmn who invented these tacos
dude 2: john taco
john taco by the wenis February 20, 2024

john oliver effect

When you get a sexy text from a stranger and just as you set off the “wee woo wee woo boner alert 🚨” you then wonder to yourself if the text is actually from a scammer being held captive in Myanmar or Cambodia
Me: Hey, I just got a wrong number text from a really hot Russian girl
Boris: Oh yeah? What’s she look like?
Me: (shows my phone to my friend)
Boris: She’s hawt! Uh oh! Wee woo wee woo boner alert 🚨….. uh wait a minute
Me: oh no
Boris: yeah, this is John Oliver effect.