Soft Pencil

When once is rolling with a soft pencil, they have a limp penis in a clutch situation and often suffer from erectile dysfunction or an orgasm that lasts a maximum of three seconds.
Did you hear what Jane said? She told me Jimmy's rolling with a soft pencil.
by Klamer October 19, 2006
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Pencil sharpener

An expression describing a female who is tight in the vagina
Man, having sex with Lilly is like putting a popsicle in a pencil sharpener
by Peepeesauce556 April 26, 2017
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#2 pencil

"Literally paige was being such a #2 pencil, its like seeiously stop taking pictures of your startbucks."
by garry jounson January 01, 2017
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mechanical pencil

wrap your dick in tin foil and go into intercourse with a woman while moaning "i need to finish the essay!" after ejaculation you say "i ran out of led, i need a refill"
pencil nut, mechanical pencil
by king awesomeness January 20, 2011
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Uzbekistan pencil sharpener

An expression of irony often used to confuse people. The user isn't supposed to say what it means to others who ask.
*something ironic and hilarious happens*
Person 1 "Uzbekistan pencil sharpener!"
Person 2 "What does that mean?"
Person 1 "Well anyways, (continues the previous conversation)."
by cornbr3ad_ October 12, 2022
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a clever euphamism for someone who lacks intelligence

see also a few bricks shy of a load, not the brightest bulb on the porch
Seth - "Did you hear about Werner? He tried to start his car with lighter fluid."

Taylor - "I'm not surprised; he's not the sharpest pencil in the drawer."
by Hey-Johnny-Johnny June 05, 2006
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sharpen your pencil

offer someone a better price
I asked the recruiter to "sharpen your pencil" when it came to the lowball salary offer she gave me the first go around.
by Arizonaguy February 29, 2012
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