molestache

1. a mustache thinner than one left by milk or kool aid reticent of creepers. 2. often found on the upper lips of hipsters who are on a quest for the truly ironic handlebar mustache but for some reason or another fail at attaining glory. they often make up for this lack of facial handlebars by riding around town on a neon fixed gear bike (with sweet handlebars) 3. sometimes found on men sporting mock turtlenecks. 4. found when boys skinny jeans are too tight and their leg hair sprouts on their upper lip instead.

"hey i heard you were trying to get a job at that local record bike store vegan organic cafe?"
"yeah, i don't think i fit in though...I don't have a molestache."
"but you're a girl..."

by oopseiffelover March 7, 2010

molesterbating

molesting yourself or someone else while masturbating

1) dude george is molesterbating trae
2) trae molsterbates himself too much

by piznitch November 6, 2003

molexted

being texted nonstop by someone you dont want to text

marry molexted me last night

by kerbe1379 October 2, 2010

cat molestor

A term for someone who molests cats. Nothing else will do, it must be feline or it won't get molested.

Girl: Hey, put my pussy down, you fucking cat molestor.
CM: No fucking way, I've only just started.

by stu-rob-billy-bob October 26, 2006

Mud Baby Molester

A peron who has anal intercourse with someone else.

A male homosexual - someone who is likely to come into 'close' contact with a Mud Baby is therefore a Mud Baby Molester.

by Peter van Dyk March 5, 2008

Molesting Unicorns

An indoctrination done by communist college professors on there very impressionable gender ambiguous students. Where ALL people who are not straight, white, or Male are Nazi sympathizers. These nutty professors mold these little participation trophy winners into "Antifa" soldiers.Along with all the BS Hollywood rhetoric and fictional biased pandering of America's fake news establishment they have formed an army of zombie-like minions who are incapable of abstract thought.

Marxist minions are at it again with our impressionable youth, I swear they're molesting unicorns and making them think they shit skittles whilst solving world hunger, if we dont fight these fruitcakes we'll all be starving or dead in 10 years

by yotaterds January 18, 2021

banana molestation

a sexual manuever most commonly known for both partners being covered in either maple or chocolate syrup. once the two are completely covered. insert a banana(peeled or unpeeled) into the anus of your partner. this part isnt entirely meant to increase pleasure, but feel free to take your time on this. once both bananas are in place. go ahead with your normal sexual activities.
once complete, you are allowed to eat the banana out of your lovers ass. if fecal matter is present on the fruit, continue eating, its proper manners.

dude, know what tastes absolutely amazing? banana molestation!

by Jazlo January 23, 2009