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jonathan

A rather irritating and insufficient waste of a human being who needs to be told everything. He doesn't know what to do,and even when he is told to do something he has no idea what the fuck it he has to do.
You: y are u not breathing?
Jonathan: o I forgot... U have to remind me, im just a Jonathan.
by jonathan sucks massive wang April 28, 2013
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jonathan

A term used to describe a male who is rather short.
Damn dude, he's such a jonathan. His parents must have been hardcore fans of Tolkien's The Hobbit to have created this abomination.
by sankishon November 12, 2018
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Jonathans

British slang term for diarrhea.

Most likely a variation on colloquial term "the trots", derived from the English cricketer Jonathan Trott
I had the Jonathans this morning.
by pamelajamsamwitch November 14, 2011
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Jonathan

what you call someone who squeaks a lot, likes men, touches callum, and chases random people up stairs. Also he runs to lessons
by weewoman March 31, 2008
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jonathan

A black person who acts white, hangs out with whites, and tries/wishes he or she was white. You can tell some one is a Jonathan if you see a black man wearing a small collard shirt which usually a fruity color (pink, yellow, light blue) and booty hugging jeans. Usually these people are gay.
1st person: Ey nigga look at that jonathan over there with the small yellow collard shirt.

2nd person: where at

1st person: over there by the white kids in front of the Abercrombie & Fitch store

2nd person: oh hahahaha what a homo
by hustla July 30, 2008
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jonathan

He is a very dumb, looking Mexican who actually is really smart
hey Jonathan how are you?
by jonathan 32 May 14, 2018
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jonathan

One of the most awful people to have faced this earth
Brian: So yeah this guy threw spaghetti in my girlfriends face whilst at the restaurant.
Ken: Wow What a Jonathan that guy.
by Old_wise_man_69_420_xoxo October 8, 2018
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