The CEO and founder of Aperture Science Innovators. Later renamed Aperture Laboratories. Has and awesome voice (JK Simmons). And is extremely rich. Got sick and died from moon-rock poisoning. Caroline is his best friend and secretary. Hates lemons if life gives them to you.
Alright, I've been thinking. When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade - make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons. I'm going to to get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down
by ram2006 May 8, 2011
Get the Cave Johnson mug.the best character from the indie game sally face. he is superior in every way and he is perfect. we dont talk about episode four though. never talk about episode four.
by Enchanted_ June 3, 2021
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If seen to be copying someone else but in a worse manner. You could say they are and absolute Boris Johnson.
by Queenofrabat July 25, 2019
Get the Boris Johnson mug.A privately educated Tory with a long name, Boris has successfully fooled the masses with his bumbling but fake personality, I honestly find it hard to believe how so few people see through this deception
by Youngling_slayer_9000 August 14, 2021
Get the Boris Johnson mug.Sergeant Johnson: "Men, we've led those dumb bugs out to the middle of nowhere to keep them from getting their FILTHY claws on Earth, but we stumbled onto somethin' they're so hot for, that they're scramblin' over each other to get it. Well, I don't care if it's God's own anti-son-of-a-bitch machine, or a giant hula hoop, we're not gonna let 'em have it! What we WILL let 'em have is a belly full of lead, and a pool of their own blood to drown in!
...AM I RIGHT, MARINES!?"
Marines: "SIR YES SIR!"
--From Halo CE--
"When I joined the Corps, we didn't have any fancy-schmancy tanks. We had sticks! TWO sticks and a rock for a whole platoon... and we had to share the rock!"
--From Halo 2--
...AM I RIGHT, MARINES!?"
Marines: "SIR YES SIR!"
--From Halo CE--
"When I joined the Corps, we didn't have any fancy-schmancy tanks. We had sticks! TWO sticks and a rock for a whole platoon... and we had to share the rock!"
--From Halo 2--
by e4c5 September 18, 2011
Get the Sergeant Johnson mug.by baylen.kyle.peej April 25, 2020
Get the Kyle Johnson mug.Girl #1: "OMG! Jack and jack digitour is coming to our state!"
Girl #2: "I know right! I'm going to give jack Edward Johnson the biggest bear hug ever
Girl #2: "I know right! I'm going to give jack Edward Johnson the biggest bear hug ever
by Sammywilkslut September 9, 2014
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