Futon World

A magical place that becomes less comfortable over time.

Futon World is not a good place to live for an extended period of time.

by stratfx300 September 25, 2007

Futon Pooper

The act of shitting on a bitch’s futon because the whore kicked you out of her bed, while wearing footsie pajamas. The worse part, you were too drunk to remember to pull down your pants, so you shit yourself.

Yo, I went to my whore's place last night and the bitch was wearing footsie pajamas and kicked me out of her fucking bed. I was so pissed I tried to shit on her futon but I shit my pants. I can't believe I'm a Futon Pooper!

by Footsie PJ April 4, 2011

futon john

A douche that likes to remind every person he meets that he was conceived on a futon.

Kid 1: "Have you met Futon John?"

Kid 2: "No, but I heard he was a douche."

Kid 3: "I heard he was conceived on a futon."

Kid 1: "I wish I was conceived on a futon."

by Dubya14 November 25, 2013

futon dick

Futon dick

A guy who provides exceptional dick from his futon but doesn't have his shit together has futon dick.

by Siouxsie Supertramp June 14, 2023

futon asshole

A video game player who deliberately breaks a futon alliance. He or she typically acts only in his or her best interest while playing the game. This includes destroying other player’s characters, stealing their Mario Party stars or other snarky behavior.

Lauren, you just stole my last star! You are a futon asshole!

by uglysinglesclub April 12, 2007

futon alliance

A close association of video game players, assembled on a futon (or other seating device), formed to advance common interests by playing as team. Members of a futon alliance are loyal and trusting of each other; they will not act against other members of the alliance. Failure to act in accordance with terms of the futon alliance will result in a player being rejected from the coalition and henceforth being known as a futon asshole.

Rebecca, you better find Molly and destroy her player or else we will lose and you will no longer be a part of this futon alliance!

by uglysinglesclub December 25, 2008

Futon Fun

To have sexual intercourse on a futon.

Guy 1: Hey what happened to Timmy last night?
Guy 2: Timmy had 25 shots of vodka and ended up having futon fun with Torrie.
Guy 1: No Way! Way to go Timmy Tivo!

by Willy Wonkah February 17, 2010