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Schoolbus Scenario

When you are trying to tell a legit story one on one, but it might sound perverted or disgusting if other people hear it.

The person listening can't hear you, or doesn't understand it at first, so you yell. Simultaneously, the entire room gets quiet.

You end up embarrassed and a wierdo for several minutes.
Matt: "What? I couldn't hear that last part, say it one more time."

Scott: "I said, I stuck it in the hole crooked, so she didn't give my money back!"

Matt: "Owch man, total schoolbus scenario, sorry."
by omgrebaomg April 22, 2009
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worst case scenario

A relative phrase, never to be uttered or even thought, lest a worse situation should arise.
A man was riding a mule along a steep mountain trail. Suddenly, a cougar darted in front of him. The mule spooked, pitched him from the saddle, and ran further down the trail, taking the man's gun, gps beacon, and supplies with it. The man tried to run, but found that his ankle was broken. He attempted to back away, instead, but his ankle collapsed on some loose stones and he fell backwards toward the precipice, catching himself at the last moment on some old tree roots. As he hung there, with the cougar pawing at the gravel above him and the roots beginning to come free of the rocky soil, he saw a bright cluster of wild berries just within reach. In despair, the man leaned out, grabbed a handful and began chewing on them -- to his surprise, they were wonderfully sweet! Savoring their taste, the man decided that he had, by all rights, lived a good life, and he braced himself for the worst.

Suddenly, the cougar pounced! The man jerked back, and to his amazement, the cougar sailed past him, lost its footing on the slope it had aimed for, and plummeted to the canyon floor far beneath. A cascade of tiny stones followed the big cat, and larger stones followed those. The man looked around and realized that a larger set of tree roots had been revealed beneath the shifting stone. He wiped his free hand, reached out, and got a secure grip. Within a minute, he was back on the trail. As he was catching his breath, he saw his slightly skittish mule trotting back down the path, heading for home. He whistled, bringing it back to him. He made a quick splint for his ankle and threw himself back into the saddle.

A few hours later, he was back at his campsite, where he told his fellow campers one of the most amazing stories they had ever heard. The man ate a hearty meal, took some aspirin for his ankle and his nerves, and went to sleep in his tent, anxious for the morning ride back to civilization.

He never woke up. The berries he ate were poisonous.

---

Whatever you are thinking, you haven't found the worst case scenario yet. Don't pretend that you have.
by Alfred F. May 6, 2008
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Helvetica Scenario

1. A situation that can arise from improper handling of the element intelligent Calcium (I-Calcium). I suggest you consult the Health and Safety Executive for guidelines. Originating from the series Look Around You blants.

2. Helvetica is a font also known as Arial. There is some confunkledness over the name and origination of this font resulting in an Helvetica Scenario.
The German physicist Wilhelm Thomason dedicated to his life to research of the Helvetica Scenario.
(Thanks, House of Steel, theel)
by Moogyboobles May 15, 2005
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Nothing burger scenario

A nothing burger or a nothing burger scenario is a though,object,person or scenario is so ridiculous that its almost meaningless like a nothing burger. It means nothing
Man the though of micheal jackson releasing a new song is so nothing burger scenario
by daboiisready July 29, 2023
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Jesus Freak Scenario

Meeting a cute girl who seems like she's into you only to be completely turned off from her upon reading that she describes herself as a "jesus freak" on her facebook/myspace.
dude1: "Hey man, how's it going with that chick you've had your eye on for a while?"

dude2: "total jesus freak scenario man. don't bring that shit up"
by asdfasdf212 September 28, 2011
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Breast-Case Scenario

1. A situation in which breasts may present themselves, leading to a night that cannot be improved (breast-wise).

2. A set of breasts that cannot be improved (surgery or otherwise).
Jeremy: How did that hott, tasty piece turn out last night?
Robb: We went back to my place; it was a total breast-case scenario.

Corlin: Did you see that babe walk by just now?
Robb: I know: total breast-case scenario!
by Robb the Knob 937 February 4, 2010
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Kite Runner Scenario

A situation in which a friend hides in fear while another friend is, either figuratively or literally, backed into a corner and butt-raped by Middle Easterners. The term refers to the memorable conflict from the novel "The Kite Runner" by Khaled Hosseini.
(In Gears of War 3) "Ben, where the hell were you?! I was shooting one of the berserkers with a scorcher, and then the second berserker came in and wrecked my shit while you were hiding! Stop putting me in Kite Runner Scenarios!"

"Way to go, man. You know that you ate Chris's sandwich but when he asked about it, you made it into a total Kite Runner Scenario.
by CommanderPoopyPants October 12, 2011
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