disasturbation 

(n) term used to describe when pleasuring oneself ends tragically with an unfortunately timed interruption

"I was jacking off and my cat jumped on my lap right before i came. It was a terrible disasturbation session."
"Then a couple days later, my mom decided to barge into my room to wake me up as i was cranking it under my sheets. I disasturbated twice this week."

disasturbation by systemofanup June 21, 2010

disasturbation 

Masturbation...with disastrous results.

Theres no such thing as the verb, "disasturbate" because you never plan it. Disasturbation is the result of a failed attempt. Disasturbation just happens, and boy does it suck when it does.

disasturbation by cakeofages October 18, 2008

disasturbation 

To masturbate during a disaster, or when normal masturbation turns disastrous.

Masturbation turns into disasturbation if you're arrested for doing it in public.

disasturbation by eosbnnaarsh November 8, 2011

disasterbation 

An irrational exhilaration and enjoyment while experiencing the effects of a natural disaster or other destructive scenario.

All these rich white folk driving around the 9th Ward in luxury coaches to go see Brad Pitt pretending to help New Orleans, it's just Yankee disasterbation.

disasterbation by Cidney January 13, 2008

Disasterbation 

To gorge on the massive amounts of fear-mongering news media that reports on nothing more than tragic and violent events across the country and the world.

The disasterbation in this country was waning after the shooting in Arizona until the earthquake/tsunami hit Japan.

Disasterbation by Sudds McDuff April 13, 2011

disasturbating 

Disasturbating: To revel in doom-mongering predictions about the future of mankind. A particular predilection of left-leaning environmentalists who claim we are but 30 years away from living in Cormac McCarthy's 'The Road', without radical change that is diametrically incompatible with how people actually want to live, and that is completely futile at the individual level anyway. There's also a right-wing version that thinks gay marriage and universal healthcare will somehow bring about the end of days.

"Oh my God, Peak Oil! Polar Ice Caps melting! Unchecked population growth! Stockpile canned goods and a shotgun, the apocalypse is coming!"
"FFS, stop disasturbating."

disasturbating by OnlyMe! November 8, 2013

disastrabate 

To masturbate to climax, using only footage of horrific natural disasters as pornography.

Bret: hey did you see the news last night? That tsunami killed like 300 people.

Chad: yeah man I TIVO'ed it so I can disastrabate when my wife leaves tonight.

disastrabate by Moosedontcare November 5, 2015