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Congress

The opposite of PROGRESS.
PRO = Good
CON = Bad
GUY 1: Hey, man, did you hear about what the government's working on in D.C.?
GUY 2: Yeah, but it's not gonna get us anywhere good. They're the Congress.
by Anything Goes Tonight October 19, 2010
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having congress

To have sexual intercourse with, including rape and beastiality. Normally used in the context of sex without any consent.
"Not three weeks before this he was run out of Fort Smith Arkansas for having congress with a goat. Yes lady, that is what I said. Goat." - Cormac McCarthy (Blood Meridian)
by jahm3z April 20, 2009
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angry congressman

After being rejected for oral, this is the process of ejaculating in ones hand and throwing it at the girl, usually using the left-into-right proceedure
She wouldn't give me head so i gave her an angry congressman. I cranked with my left into my right for optimum throw range
by newo May 13, 2005
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Congressional Medal of Circular Tastiness

A round cookie given to someone for accomplishing some task.
Congratulations on winning the ping-pong tournament. You are hereby awarded the Congressional Medal of Circular Tastiness.
by Tom from March 27, 2007
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Congress

Congress usually refers to the national legislative body of a country. However, congress is a term also used for a group of baboons. That there are obvious similarities between these groups should be pretty obvious to most.
Consider a group of Baboons, they are the loudest, most dangerous, most obnoxious, most viciously aggressive and least intelligent of all primates. And what is the proper collective noun for a group of baboons? Believe it or not ....... a Congress!

I guess that pretty much explains the things that come out of Washington!
by rufustherat September 5, 2011
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Congress

A large group of older men who probably have penis sizes lower than average. They enjoy finding things they dislike, or don't control, and trying to destroy/ruin them. They think mainly of themselves and don't mind destroying a few lives to make a quick buck. They avoid taxes and keep their millions of dollars to themselves, and think that those who are poor need to stay poor and they need to stay on top. They recently tried to steal the internet, but where shot down. They also believe that constitutional rights aren't really that important, and can be bent to their liking.
SOPA/ACTA/PIPA are all acts of the Congress.

They can be compared to the Church during the middle ages. Take from the poor, keep it for yourself.
by A pissed off citizen April 9, 2012
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thanks, Congress!

Slang used to blame real problems on the ineffectual Republican-obstructed Congress.
Coined during the 2013 government shutdown. Used literally, as opposed to the sarcastic "thanks Obama."
The NSF, NIST, NASA, NIH, FDA, EPA, etc were shut down, we lost around 300,000 jobs and $24 billion from the economy – thanks, Congress!
by Dylan Bleier November 2, 2013
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