Windows Computer

A piece of technology that is used to surf the web, play games, or, as most commonly used, to look up porn. It works for it's purpose, but you know that it's not the best. You use it, but only because you have to, and are too afraid to put in the time and money of getting a real computer that doesn't shit itself and die every time you look at it too hard.

It's lot like a bad prostitute.

Dude 1: Hey man, so hows your Windows Computer doing?
Dude 2: Not so good. I mean, it works, but every time I'm using it I always scream out "MACINTOSH!" by mistake.

by TheVampireKow October 18, 2009

windows update

(n.) - A utility installed on most newer Windows OS's, which is used for simple minded folk to easily ""fix"" the holes in common windows programs.

i. Bob doesn't understand how to update his computer in a proper manner, so he uses windows update instead.

by Agent Spork November 13, 2003

Windows ME

1: Either a cruel... cruel joke or one more reason why Bill Gates should be decapitated and dismembered with a pointed rock made entirely out of AIDS.

2: The one true cause for all of the pain and suffering in the world and possibly the universe.

1: OMG, Bill was serious with the ME!! GET THE AIDS ROCK!!

2: ME's code is Satan's supreme overlord.

by Kevin T. June 4, 2005

Windows XP

The best damn operating system ever made, except maybe Windows 2000. So good, that people are still using it even after 9 years (an eternity in computer time) despite the fact Microsoft came out with two more Operating Systems since then.

You can tell someone is a jealous mac/linux fanboy by the way they bash Windows XP.

by CommandoDude September 26, 2010

Windows 95

Four words, Blue screen of Death

Windows crashed again??

by bOb_the Definer April 16, 2005

windows xp

1) Although some would say it is the best OS that MS has made, some would argue that Win 2k is better. I say it is preference. I use WinXP on my computer and it runs near flawlessly. Compatibility (along with other problems) is only a problem encountered by those who can't figure out how to use a search engine to find a solution, so they come here to rant about it. Simple to use, if you follow directions and maybe read the manual, it hardly crashes and always tries to save your system by crashing the violating program. Although the "report error" window is useless, it is better than having to reboot. When you use the system manager (aka ctrl-alt-delete) you can use the "processes" tab to instantly shut down a program without any wait or consequence (in my experience). System important processes are clearly marked "system" so that you cannot accidentally crash windows (unless you are an idiot). 2) An OS made by a company that people like to belittle because they suck at using a user-friendly OS. 3) Not as advanced as Linux, which means it's easier to use, yet not as flexible.

1) Windows XP is a fine OS, thanks for a decent on with this time, Microsoft!
2)d00d, XP sux! ROFL BOFL!
3)guy1: "Hmm, which OS should i use?"
guy2: "Do you know how to use Linux?"
guy1: "No..."
guy2: "Use Windows XP"

by PacketOverflow October 2, 2004

windows hasta la vista

A nickname given to Microsoft's new operating system, Windows Vista, by those who have major problems with it.

My new computer came with Windows Hasta La Vista. I got a blue screen of death every time it booted up.

by computer_guy February 16, 2008