Beating Crickets

When you have erectile dysfunction and try to whack off to no avail.

I’ve been trying to get myself off all night, but it’s just beating crickets.

by Hair-ninja89 August 26, 2020

Beating around the bush

When pubic hair is surrounding the penis but you continue to masterbait. This is most common when a man is procrastinating.

Hey stepbro will you stop beating around the bush and get me out out of the laundry machine!

by The mightiest orange chicken. October 11, 2020

Beating the whole village

Used when a guy takes his time and patiently and continuously is master-bating all night over and over again.

Greg was beating the whole village again last night.

by El Guapo 29 January 1, 2021

beating air

When you’re masturbating, but you’re just not into it

I was beating air all night, I just couldn’t get off

by Esperanato January 22, 2021

Beating Spoon

The spoon used by an African mother to beat children who misbehave.

Mother: Come to the kitchen boy
Child: OH SHIT NOT THE BEATING SPOON AGAIN!

by J3sus is a homie March 7, 2021

Beating off behind the bush

Synonymous with beating around the bush.

I know there’s something weighing on your mind Johnny, just stop beating off behind the bush and and say it.

by anonymous July 24, 2021

Beating off behind the bush

Synonymous with beating around the bush.

Listen Johnny, I know you have some thing weighing on your mind right now, just stop beating off behind the bush and say it.

by anonymous July 24, 2021