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pubic inch

A Pubic Inch is a fictional dynamic unit of measurement that varies according to the sex of the person using it and also the context in which it is being used.

For men trying to cover up the fact theyve got a tiny prick, a pubic inch is exactly twice that of an standard British inch (conversion factor 1:2). The pubic inch allows them to save face and convince themselves they are no less of a man, even though theyve only got a chippolatta rather than a beef bayonet.

For men joking about the size of any of their mates cocks, a pubic inch becomes half that of a standard inch (conversion factor 2:1), in order for them to feel good about their miniscule winkies.

For women talking about the size of their long term boyfriends johnson, a pubic inch is twice that of a normal inch so they can boast about their amazing sex life, when actually he goes to sleep after 5 minutes of frantic pumping, shoots his load and leaves her unsatisfied everytime. But at least her girlfriends think she's got a good sex life, and because like all women she cares more about what other people think of her than her own happiness, then its all ok (take high heels as a perfect example, constant pain just because they think it looks good, stupidity at its highest)

For women telling their friends about the guy they shagged last night or the long term boyfriend theyve just split up with (who probably performed as above), a pubic inch becomes the size of the lady in questions little finger. Demonstrated by clenching the fist and wiggling the little finger about like a maggot
Yeah ive got massive cock, at least 9 inches long.
I saw jeffs knob in the shower n its like a button mushroom! Probably only an inch at most!
Well, my bobbys got a huge knob, at least 10 inches! And we dont have sex, we make love and its just beautiful.
Oh my god you should have seen it! It was like a baby catapiller! (wiggles her little finger)
by Rickyricardo September 16, 2005
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Panic Knife

The act of knifing someone purely out of excitement in Call of Duty. Bad players will freeze up on the controller when they see you pop up suddenly before them and slam on the right thumbstick resulting in your death at close range, every time.
Me: Wow that pussy panic knifed me 1 offdogs!...

Friend: That's what you get for bringing a gun to a gun fight.

Me: That's ok, I'm sure they'll realize that panic knifing is a fundamental problem with the CoD series and fix it for Mw3.

Friend: No...
by PSN ForeverDecay October 8, 2011
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panic! at the disco

a band that was once praised by their home base fans for having such original music and rockin out their own way. however, their home base fans seemed to have been replaced with richy riches that can afford to buy 13 tickets to the panic! at the disco show and sing along to i write sins not tragedies and stand there the rest of the concert.
New Fan of P!ATD: Like, oh em gee! that one guy in panic! at the disco is sooo hot!!! isn't is name pete wentz? i cant wait to meet him at the concert. im going to look so scene!
Home Base P!ATD fan: uh.. you mean ryan? the guitarist..of panic at the disco? pete is the bassist of fall out boy. they look nothing alike. ..
New Fan: oh yeah him... oh... YAY!
by onomatepoea June 12, 2006
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pubic topiary

The act of grooming a lady garden into a more manageable and attractive state.
I say, young lady, with such a profusion of spiders legs I think you require an intensive session of pubic topiary !
by Andrew Nicholson November 23, 2004
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pubic clippings

The remains of pubic hair that is usually found on the bathroom floor after one decides to clip their pubes.
Doug - "Take a shower!"
Andy - "Get a better computer!"
Doug - "Go shoot yourself!"
Andy - "Clip your pubes!"
Doug - "I DID! LOOKIE!"
Andy - "Wow...I can only imagine how many pubic clippings are on your bathroom floor."
by qAaRoN July 12, 2005
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pubic hair

A patch of hair near the private parts. Men have it, women have it. It's like a jungle down there.
Speaking of which, I learned that white people don't use washcloths. Did you know that? I'm serious they got one bar of soap in the house. Every time I go to use it, someone's pubic hair was in it. Why yo ass gonna put the wrong bar of soap in your butt and all that. Maybe I need to wash my face...or my feet.
by Marcus Reed October 5, 2006
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pubical

A cubical that smells.
Yeah, stop farting in your pubical.
by ilovenicole July 24, 2009
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