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5 o'clock boner 

A cause for alarm; chemically stressed induced morning errection you are awake for. A boner for the night crews, a grave yard shift errection from hell. this type of errection lasts and lasts usually starting at about 3-9 am. And only becomes painfully aware.
but usually is pretty precise at about 5 o'clock.

This massive errection does not go away. This is the awake version of morning wood. Nothing you can think about can make this bitch go away. Its not even sexual! Its just there, angry and you're tired, a zombie with swamp ass and a raging boner that feels painful. Its just there. Awake and the more tired you get. The harder it inflates
but as soon as your shift or whatever is over.

Limp dick motherfucker all over again.
"Ahh, I have a raging angry 5 o'clock boner" said the Marine on post..

"The night clerk tried hiding his 5 o'clock boner behind the cash register

The night clean up crew man was walking bent over.. cause his 5 o'clock boner.

God, I need to get home to chop this thing off or put it in ice water..

The boner you wish you had during sex
5 o'clock boner by SLAA addict June 27, 2014
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what a boner 

Another way of saying "what a bummer"
Your mom didn't buy you an Xbox one? What a boner.
what a boner by Fireguy47 June 11, 2017

semi lady boner 

When the female can feel the moisture coming to their vagina.
“I saw Matt Damon and got a semi lady boner.”
semi lady boner by Cabbin February 12, 2018

Twangy Boner 

A boner that doesn't sound like it should. Usually your boner sounds like theres a loose gland.
Bob: I was bangin' my wife last night and when I smacked my boner off her face it didn't sound like it used to when I was 12.
Phil: Dude, you have a Twangy Boner.
Twangy Boner by definition thrower November 23, 2009

Serial Boner 

A person, male, which nails many girls on a regular basis.
Chad:Hey man, I slept with that girl last night, it was amazing!

Brian:Dude, it's your 4th girl this week! you are definitely a Serial Boner!
Serial Boner by Babyman1 July 10, 2010

Menstruation Boner

A boner in the clitoral region that a girl gets during the beginning stages of menstruation. It typically occurs during the first fifteen minutes of menstruation.
Everyone can see that Sally has a raging menstruation boner.
Menstruation Boner by Werd1234567 November 30, 2009

hair boner 

when a girl with short hair puts her hair in a ponytail such that it resembles a male erection or boner. this is the only time a woman will ever or should ever sport a boner.
"damn, your hair boner just hit me in the face."

"is it just me or is your hair boner more voluminous than usual?"

"i like your style. that hair boner is hot."

hair boner by apt effay November 26, 2007