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Jesus Sperm Theory

We are in a universe sized sperm cell from Jesus and it's going normal sperm speed but we are so small it feels like forever
"Jesus Sperm Theory saved my life man"- Jeffrey Epstein
by Saddam Huissain June 18, 2023
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Julienne de jesus

Amazing. Just amazing.

The true definition to the word friend,
Julienne de jesus is not only the more hyper and crazy chaotic person you will ever meet but she is also the kindest most beautiful girl in the whole world. Although she’s been through some tough times her smile never fails to brighten the room. Julienne thank you for everything Girl Even if this seems cringe and sentimental I mean it. Love you girl 💗💗
“Is that Julienne de jesus? God she look’s like an Angel..”
by anonymous June 25, 2023
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Jesus posting

Jesus posting or just Jesusposting is a subsection of "shit posting" where you use religious quotes in a satirical manner
-Did you see Jake post that fucked up photo saying "embrace Jesus"

-Yeah He's just Jesus posting
by HenryS June 28, 2023
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The Pharisees hated Jesus because he told them the truth.

A way of saying "You know I'm right" when someone gets angry at you for speaking the truth. According to scripture, the Pharisees were a group of Jewish elders in Judea (the name of Israel under Roman occupation) who took every chance they could get to catch Jesus and his disciples lacking.
Virgin Woke Urbanist: Amtrak is bad! travel cross-country by air! Or on a Greyhound bus!

Chad Nerd: Actually, there's nothing wrong with Amtrak, and aside from Greyhound, they were picking up the slack during the recent airline meltdowns.

VWU: NO! SHUT UP! THAT'S NOT TRUE!

CN: The Pharisees hated Jesus because he told them the truth.
by Stupidly Sophisticated January 15, 2023
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Black Jesus

Black Jesus is a nickname given to highly regarded as the greatest basketball player of all time Micheal Jordan
Bro we dont shit talk to Black Jesus cause if we do he will give us 60
by FadedIsCool January 28, 2023
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Korean Jesus

"Hey, hey! Stop fuckin' with Korean Jesus. He ain't got time for yo problems, he's busy wit Korean shit!"
by pikcled January 31, 2023
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Jesus

Someone who everyone on this site should learn about. He would very much so like if you were to go to church. Thank You 🙏.
Accept Jesus Christ as your lord and savior
by Please Just Go To Church February 1, 2023
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