"Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior Linux?"
An elitist Linux nerd who preaches that Linux is the one true greatest operating system, and sees all non-believers as inferior to themselves.
Derived from Jehovah's Witness.
An elitist Linux nerd who preaches that Linux is the one true greatest operating system, and sees all non-believers as inferior to themselves.
Derived from Jehovah's Witness.
No, I will not use Linux, you damn Torvalds' Witnesses!
Jesus. That's the last time I'm ever using Stack Exchange!
Jesus. That's the last time I'm ever using Stack Exchange!
by Banderhausen Hösenflausen July 6, 2023
Get the Torvalds' Witness mug.A testifier in court who claims dat he heard someone affirm/consent regarding a matter under contention by da two parties.
Da term "aye-witness" and also refer to a bu**s**t-spouting "yes-man" on da stand --- i.e., a shameless/clueless testimony-giver who just always agrees regarding anything he's asked about by either side of a legal proceeding, regardless of whether he actually thinks/knows dat his always confirming questions is truly accurate or not.
by QuacksO November 27, 2023
Get the aye-witness mug.Related Words
A rare, underground-dwelling people believed to have originated after the legendary Jenovah Convention of 1934. Of the 3,500 attendees, 890 were known as the Sons of Jenovah, eyewitnesses to the miracles performed by Jenovah himself. Consumed by jealousy, they turned on their Father and slaughtered him.
In a brutal battle within the convention hall, the remaining 2,610 attendees rose up and defeated the Sons of Jenovah. Only 16 survivors emerged from the bloodshed. These survivors swore an oath of secrecy, vowing to live hidden underground and to abduct any surface-dwellers who dared speak of Jenovah again.
These Jenovah’s Witnesses have an unusually long lifespan of 320 years. Over generations, they split into 8 distinct clans, each with its own surname and customs. Due to centuries spent underground in isolation, their appearance has become... unsettling. Distorted by time, darkness, and perhaps guilt, they are widely considered to be shockingly hideous—described in some accounts as “fugly beyond mortal comprehension.”
Today, they remain a mysterious and feared presence, their story passed down in whispers, warnings, and the occasional missing-persons report.
In a brutal battle within the convention hall, the remaining 2,610 attendees rose up and defeated the Sons of Jenovah. Only 16 survivors emerged from the bloodshed. These survivors swore an oath of secrecy, vowing to live hidden underground and to abduct any surface-dwellers who dared speak of Jenovah again.
These Jenovah’s Witnesses have an unusually long lifespan of 320 years. Over generations, they split into 8 distinct clans, each with its own surname and customs. Due to centuries spent underground in isolation, their appearance has become... unsettling. Distorted by time, darkness, and perhaps guilt, they are widely considered to be shockingly hideous—described in some accounts as “fugly beyond mortal comprehension.”
Today, they remain a mysterious and feared presence, their story passed down in whispers, warnings, and the occasional missing-persons report.
by Brotein Powder Shake June 28, 2025
Get the Jenovahs Witness mug.When one has befouled a public washroom to such an extent that they will go to any lengths to NOT be found out as the culprit.
As demonstrated by Lukas Haas in the 1985 Harrison Ford film 'Witness'. Wherein, Haas hides from a suspicious Danny Glover in a public washroom.
As demonstrated by Lukas Haas in the 1985 Harrison Ford film 'Witness'. Wherein, Haas hides from a suspicious Danny Glover in a public washroom.
I walked into the bathroom at work less than two minutes after Jamie and the stench was unimaginable. I looked to the stalls to see if his shoes were present, but he was totally trying to pull a Witness - trying not to get caught fumigating.
by EvilBiscuit September 4, 2013
Get the Pull a Witness mug.One who lives by the bro code, and persistently shoves the bro code down people's throats, mainly his/her close friends. Eventually crosses the line of douchebaggery.
One friend was concerned about the other about losing him to his girlfriend. Not expressing much tactfulness, he dropped the phrase "bros before hoes."
The following status was found on said friend's Facebook timeline:
"I respect those who look out for me, but when you shove the bro code down my fucking throat like you're a gebrovah's witness, that's past where I draw the line. "Bros before hoes..." kindly eat a bag of dicks."
The following status was found on said friend's Facebook timeline:
"I respect those who look out for me, but when you shove the bro code down my fucking throat like you're a gebrovah's witness, that's past where I draw the line. "Bros before hoes..." kindly eat a bag of dicks."
by PyGuy March 13, 2014
Get the gebrovah's witness mug.a cop out you use sometimes when someone else says they didnt do something you told them they did. sometimes it can happen because of drinking a lot over the years and it would make you think that. or if ur just drunk af. it can also happen because you just wanna fake rat on someone for fun.
guy 1: hey you broke my push broom!
guy 2: no i didnt because i dont remember it breaking when using it.
guy 1: i have witnesses!
guy 2: your crazy
guy 1: no im not!
guy 2: *talks under his breath* boy i bet he drinks alot!
guy 2: no i didnt because i dont remember it breaking when using it.
guy 1: i have witnesses!
guy 2: your crazy
guy 1: no im not!
guy 2: *talks under his breath* boy i bet he drinks alot!
by nobody else here October 23, 2017
Get the i have witnesses mug.A religion that's losing more members than gaining.
JWs are generally very kind and loving people, although they are very stubborn when hearing facts from non JWs.
The religion is very strict and organized throughout the whole earth.
They all teach the same things, and believe the same things.
They go from door to door teaching people about the bible, and if accepted, they may start a bible study and the person may eventually become baptized.
However, they never force people to accept them and their beliefs.
It's considered dangerous and a to make friends outside the religion, which is one of the reasons it's considered a cult.
Unlike popular belief, pedophiles are kicked out of the congregation, and are reported to the police.
The religion has high requirements, so many infact, that many people can't even be baptized because they don't or can't meet standards. And due to the strict standards, many people are leaving the religion or being disfellowshipped, especially ones that grew up with it.
JWs are generally very kind and loving people, although they are very stubborn when hearing facts from non JWs.
The religion is very strict and organized throughout the whole earth.
They all teach the same things, and believe the same things.
They go from door to door teaching people about the bible, and if accepted, they may start a bible study and the person may eventually become baptized.
However, they never force people to accept them and their beliefs.
It's considered dangerous and a to make friends outside the religion, which is one of the reasons it's considered a cult.
Unlike popular belief, pedophiles are kicked out of the congregation, and are reported to the police.
The religion has high requirements, so many infact, that many people can't even be baptized because they don't or can't meet standards. And due to the strict standards, many people are leaving the religion or being disfellowshipped, especially ones that grew up with it.
Person 1: Those Jehovah's Witnesses are nice people, but they are so strict I could never be a part of their religion.
Person 2: Yeah, if I joined I wouldn't last long, it's not worth it, even though I agree with their beliefs on the bible.
Person 2: Yeah, if I joined I wouldn't last long, it's not worth it, even though I agree with their beliefs on the bible.
by Raptarex May 22, 2020
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