witlessism (wit less iz em) NOUN. A failed attempt to sound wise or clever.
"I'm telling you there's an enemy that would like to attack America, Americans, again. There just is. That's the reality of the world. And I wish him all the very best." -George W. Bush, Jan. 12, 2009

"I've been in the Bible every day since I've been the president." -George W. Bush, Nov. 12, 2008

"It's in our country's interests to find those who would do harm to us and get them out of harm's way." -George W. Bush, April 28, 2005

"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." -George W. Bush, Aug. 5, 2004

Are good examples of witlessisms.
by Maxhole June 25, 2009
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'Witless Dishcloth' is a derogatory term used to insult someone when they are being obnoxious and time-wasting. This phrase was coined by James May on the first episode of season three of the Amazon Prime Exclusive and Original, The Grand Tour.
1st example (origin): I just wanna say, Hammond, you witless dishcloth!
2nd example: Patrick, are you repeating Year 11 at school? Dale asked
Patrick: Dale, I DON'T wanna talk about it mate. Alright?!? Just give it up moiiiite.
Dale: Oi dickhead, just fuckin tell me yeh?
Patrick: Just blud off, blud! Alright?!!
Dale: Oh Partick you fuckin witless dishcloth, just get the rest of the business notes down on the google doc dickhead.
by dalespelman2 September 23, 2019
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One who finds themself very funny, though no else around them does.
Gina is a witless bitch; she's the only one that laughs at her "jokes".
by Jacques December 23, 2004
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A derogatory nickname for a Jehovah's Witness, refering to the apparent witless, clueless and lamebrain beliefs (as percieved by normal persons) of the church dogma and its members.
Do you Jehovah's Witlesses always dress like dorks or are these just your Sunday-go-to-meeting clothes?
by GBofWI March 17, 2007
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Selectively telling people you've converted right around Christmas so you receive lots of presents but don't give any
Dan tried to pull a Jehovah Witless on everybody so his present from me is gonna be a log of shit in a box
by PapaNickDawg March 9, 2011
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a cunt of the witless variety.
Someone who does unbelievably stupid things with no knowledge of their own stupidity.
He put half a g of ketamine up his nose for breakfast. What a witless cunt.
by the witless October 1, 2007
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a funny Fuckface von Clownstick insult coined by the Scots. others include incompressible jizzvon Clownsticket, Mangled apricot hellbeast, and others
used by brexit scotland when fuckface von clownstick was visiting scotland.they were calling him a witless fucking cocksplat
by curtis450 September 8, 2017
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