Skip to main content

Party Animal

A fairly large creature, the wild American Party Animal is often seen in his natural habitats.

Finding him is not the most trying of tasks; one need simply walk to the nearest fraternity house, bar, pub, club, college dorm, or house to find one.

His eating habits are not yet completely known or understood, but he is frequently seen rejecting the contents of his stomach into vases, urns, toilets, top-loading washing machines, priceless heirlooms, and other receptacles. This demonstrates his inability to recognize the sentimental or emotional value of objects.

He is sometimes hairy, sometimes quite close-shaven, but will almost always cover his head with a hat of some kind, even in the summer where temperatures in his habitat reach in excess of eighty degrees Fahrenheit.

His language skills are simpler than that of the ordinary human, often using sounds such as "bro", "cash", "broad", and "home skillet" that have no meaning to a true human being.

Despite his cultural deficiencies, the Party Animal often lives quite a luxurious lifestyle. They are known to rely on their parents for protection and sustenance until, on average, they reach the age of 25 and can no longer rely on their parents stability of mind for food and money.

A captive Party Animal will "imprint" himself on the first female, or "broad" in his primitive language, that he sees. The function of this is not known, as he tends to dismiss her advances in favor of other members of her pack. In the wild, Party Animals will seek out the sick, weak, or most intoxicated of females for his mate. Party Animals do not mate for life; they tend to drift from female to female. Their semen is almost totally inert from excessive alcoholism and drug use, so the male Party Animal must spread his genetic material into as many females as possible to ensure the survival of his species.

The Party Animal culture is something of a strange one. Their principle forms of liquid sustenance are Busch Light, Icehouse, Jagermeister (a peculiar beverage which is made by distilling the sweat of nerds and mixing it with rat poison), Smirnoff, and Mike's Hard Lemonade. The combination of these drinks can result in severe headaches, sensitivity to light and sound, impaired sexual performance, increased sexual desire, loss of coordination, predilection for wearing lamp shades, slurred speech, increased desire to dance, decreased dancing performance, violent tendencies, and violent episodes of nausea culminating in the forceful expulsion of partially digested food ("Blowing Chunks"). To this day, it is unknown exactly why the Party Animal chooses to gorge himself on such a volatile mixture of chemicals when consuming moderate amounts results in a much more pleasant experience overall, including feelings of intense happiness, love for all living things, increased tactile function, increased enunciation, and no nasty after-effects.

The Party Animal is something of a showoff, often taunting local law enforcement officials with such devastatingly intelligent insults as "Fuck da po-lice!" and "I'm a cop killa, bitch!". Their bravado soon vanishes in the face of a legal battle, in which the Party Animal will sit to one side of a courtroom and cry while his mother and father protect him from the legal system. His tendency to learn is not significant in this regard, however, as he is usually seen taunting police officials soon after his detainment and bragging about his "hard" status. The term "hard" in this context is utter nonsense to a non-Party Animal, for the reason that they have a level of intelligence greater than the average fungus found growing on wheat bread. However, through extensive research, it has been determined that the Party Animal associates legal trouble with hardness, a possible link to the high levels of male-on-male anal rape in prison.

The male Party Animal is a simple creature with a few basic mating rituals:
-Force a potential mate to consume large amounts of the aforementioned intoxicating liquids in order to reduce her brain function to his level
-While his target is not looking, drop a tablet or pill of heavy sedative into her drink in order to reduce her likelihood of avoiding his sexual advances
-Take what he wants by overpowering his target, usually a weak-minded, weak-willed, weak-bodied female possessed of robust mammary glands.

The death of a Party Animal is somewhat strange; he does not die per se, merely evolves into a greater level of complexity. It is hypothesized that the Party Animal is a stage of metaporphosis that ends when the Party Animal leaves a university. The peculiar thing about these circumstances is that it does not matter how successful the Party Animal is while attending university. Regardless of academic success, the Party Animal will almost immediately recognize his need for sustenance once he realizes that his parents will no longer care for him.
Party Animal: "Yo, brah, wanna pop back some brewskis wit me an' my crew here?"
Human: "I'm sorry? Speak slowly, I'm not familiar with your language."
by Mushroom Machine March 8, 2009
mugGet the Party Animal mug.

Party Ring

The hole in which one recieves unlimited party pleasure.
"There's a party ring between my legs and everyone's invited"
by TheGashers October 14, 2009
mugGet the Party Ring mug.

Party-Party Day

Occurs when the day of the month matches the corresponding number of the month
Mike: Hey! Its March 3rd, Party-Party Day!
John: What?
Mike: Its 3/3/10, let's go Party-Party!
John: Yeahhhhhhh!
by nosajyanks January 2, 2011
mugGet the Party-Party Day mug.

party bag

Snorting powdered drugs (MDMA, speed, cocaine, ketamine etc.) directly from the bag using a straw. A very hardcore method. Common amongst clubbers who cant line it up easily, discreet method.
"fancy a party bag, we wont get caught this way?"
by tachawmw January 19, 2008
mugGet the party bag mug.

party rocking

Having an extremely loud, out of control party. Commonly used term by the band LMFAO. If you show up to a party already tore up you say "sorry for party rocking."
Sorry for party rocking
If you show up already tore up this is what you saySorry for Party Rocking
And if your blacked out with your sack out this is what you say
Sorry For Party Rocking
And if you throw up in your hoe's cup this is what you say
Sorry for Party Rocking
And if she has a hissy fit cause your whisky dick this is what you say
Sorry For Party Rocking

"Sorry For Party Rocking" by LMFAO
by princessbxoxo May 2, 2012
mugGet the party rocking mug.

Party socks

Socks which failed to be removed prior to intercourse. Said socks need not be used only during sex. Party socks are usually the result of laziness or haste.
We were totally going at it but I had to stop him because I couldn't stop laughing at his party socks.
by lol party sox December 8, 2005
mugGet the Party socks mug.

party karma

What you have to build up(through restraint and abstinence) before a big night to truly be 'off the hook". .

Conversely, what you have spent too much of if you wake up from a bender feeling guilty and depressed saying you will never drink/party/indulge again.
Kai: My b-day is gonna be so smack, I haven't been out past 9:00 in over a month!

Jesse: Daaamn son, you been building up some serious party karma.
by yogadude January 22, 2011
mugGet the party karma mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email