There's a condom behind that bookshelf

Joke about children's attitude towards sex and lack of practical knowledge or reading skills.

Kid A: There's a condom behind that bookshelf.


Kid B: What's a bookshelf?

by Kung-Fu Jesus May 2, 2004

Condomer

A girl whom you have to wear a condom when you have sex with her. (cause of massive STDs)

Most likely a girl who sleeps around alot.

Mike: Man, i hope you used protection when you did that slut the other night,

Joe: Ofcourse, shes such a Condomer

by Snoos September 30, 2009

hot sauce condom

A risky (but kinky) activity with the male wearing two condoms with hot sauce in between them. A successful act is when it doesn’t break, but when one breaks, either the hot sauce leaks into the woman, or the man causing horrible pain but also the excitement of risk.

Marv prepared the hot sauce condom and went to fucking Lucy. They were into kinky stuff, so the hot sauce condom was a regular thing. Marv thrusted Lucy hard, over and over. UHHH! HARDER! HARDERRRR! YESSS! Marv gave it all he got until the condom broke on his end. He didn’t feel it at first, but when he felt pain, he knew something was wrong. He was about to orgasm when he pulled out. He yelled in pain. “Ow, my dick!” He rushed to the bathroom to wash off the hot sauce. It burned his dick and he clutched it in pain. Then the blue balls syndrome hit him. His balls dragged across the carpet as he attempted to crawl away.

by Well, shit. January 17, 2018

female condom

a lubricated polyethylene sheath that is inserted into the vagina. A ring grasps the bottom of the cervix. The sheath extends outside the labia. They are expensive, but most guys don't even know they are there unless they explore with fingers. You can buy disposable underpants with these things in place so that the woman can go out on a date all set to fuck "protected".

Susie used a female condom the first time, that way there was no interruption to put on a male condom.

by Jake February 3, 2004

Condoleezzarice

verb. To condoleezzarice: Skillfully manoever around hairy questions without answering them directly.

The prosecutor was tough, but the defendant was able to condoleezzarice himself out of every questions masterfully.

by Yoova August 24, 2006

condom Houdini

During sex, when a man loses his condom inside of the woman and she does not find it for days. He makes the condom disappear!

"Goddamn it Jesse, you pulled a condom houdini!"

by Lacy McPanties May 16, 2006

Condom

Using a condom and being protected, will avoid you from being on shows like, The Maury and Jerry Springer show.

"ah hell nah, I ain't this babies daddy Maury, ah hell nah, she sleep wit dem otha guyz, I wear a condom on that ho"

"This ain't ma child, look at dat ugly childs face, she a ho Maury"

by Josh ye ye February 23, 2008