I want to die

Are you in school right now?

OMG this prison named school sucks i want to die

i know, me too

by uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhj October 9, 2019

I guarantee it

George Zimmer's closing statement, especially after the successful use of his monolithic man meat.

Hi, I’m George Zimmer, founder and CEO of the men's wearhouse. While surreptitiously plunging my rosy-cheeked cyclopean ally into the anal cavity of a young migrant farm worker of indeterminate gender in the front row of a movie theater, the poor youth screamed for more than three minutes straight, finally coughing up a load of 100% pure Zimmer sauce and passing out. The other movie patrons, angry at the interruption of the adventures of sharkboy and lavagirl in 3-d, began pelting me with drinks, food, and phone numbers hastily written on napkins. Unfortunately, my outrageously dapper suit was ruined in the process. I nonchalantly pulled the unconscious youth off my enormous eyeball gouger and stripped nude. Then, with a bestial roar, I beat the entire audience to death--without leaving the front row. On my way out, in the custom of the Zimmer family, I gave them a burial at semen. I guarantee it.

by ms. anonymous September 10, 2008

i have to pee

A good way to get out of an awkward situation.

Guy 1- yo you gonna hook up with Stacy?
Me, internally- gross no
Guy 2- yea you and Stacy man
Me- I have to pee

by Theunicornmanz May 6, 2018

I'm not as think as you drunk I am.

A spoof, often on a t-shirt, of someone who is so drunk that they begin to confuse words in a sentence with other words, and switch their places, often after an all night party.

"Joe, you can't drive home, you're wasted."
"Yeah, I'll drive you man."
"Nah, guys, don't worry about it. I'm not as think as you drunk I am."

by Conman140069 January 5, 2010

I wouldn't piss up your ass if your guts were on fire.

The ultimate FUCK YOU.
I would rather watch you die from internal hellfire, rather than extinguish your flaming innards with my urine.

Suzie: Hey man you are a fucking dick, why do you treat everyone like shit?

Balls Hampton: Fuck you bitch! I wouldn't piss up your ass if your guts were on fire.

Suzie: Weeps uncontrollably

by GGR September 29, 2008

I'm Shleep

A perfect way of saying I'm done

Rose:I'm so hungry
Moises:You're always hungry I'm Shleep

by King_Ace July 24, 2016

I wuv you

A cute and playfull way of saying: "I love you".

A girl wants to seem even more cute and lovable to her boyfriend so she says "I wuv you!" too him instead of "I love you!".

by Rebselm April 28, 2019