Sideline Simping

When a girl you like is in a relationship, so you stay friends until she is available. That is when you tag in and shoot your shot.

Her: "We have been fighting recently so I don't know, we might break up."

You: "I hope you can work it out. Just be careful, Celtic is totally sideline simping."

by SmollYeti November 30, 2021

Shadow Simping

Simping for someone who is already in a relationship.

“Gus is a cool guy but he’s always shadow simping for Mike’s girl so I don’t really trust him.”

by Crazy Train McGraw January 20, 2022

Table Simping

The act of being submissive to a person simply because they bought a table at a nightclub. Typically occurs when a dude with daddy's money isn't funny or capable of speaking to women, so he spends $5-10k on a table and invites a hot girl with 30+ bodies to stand next to him at his table. The girl wears a slutty cocktail dress and the guy wears ripped light wash jeans, Yeezy's, a gold chain on the outside of his shirt, and a black t-shirt so tight it might as well be painted on. The entire concept is adjacent to prostitution. It's an easy way for beta men to fuck a whore without 'technically' paying for it.

"Hey friends, I was thinking of having a group dinner at my place this Thursday. Maybe cook up some chicken parm and sip some wine while we watch the sunset! Are you interested?"

"No, sorry, I'm going to see insert no-name DJ tonight. Steve from the Seaport is buying $1,500 bottles of shitty Tito's at a nightclub the size of my bedroom, so I'm gonna go table simping."

by artfuldodger69 August 19, 2022

Lump-Summing

The act of grouping people you hate together as if they were all the same person; usually giving them all the same disparaging handle or slur.

"How is it that all you conservatives are racist nazis?"

"How is it all you progressives are communist pedophiles?"

"Would you both just stop Lump-Summing eachother?"

by Muttemor September 3, 2022

magic swimming

That act of swimming while stoned or under the influence of cannabis

Mate I went magic swimming after smoking some gelato and it felt amazing

by Xylevan January 31, 2023

Executive Skimming

To review something to such a minimal extent that it can't even count as skimming, but still form an opinion on it that is usually outlandish due to the lack of understanding of the content.

Bro, Mike didn't prepare at all for this presentation, he was executive skimming again! Who's going to correct him in front of the CEO!?

by Truffula June 19, 2023

SSS (Stop Simping September)

Do not simp in september, or you lose the challenge.

X:"Dude,is september, you can't simp, or you lose the SSS (Stop Simping September)!"

by erpiccionotto March 22, 2021