Skip to main content

Phoenix, AZ

The Capital city of Arizona - one of the last states to become a state, because it took forever for the rest of the US to massacre the resident population of natives. Phoenix is population-wise extremely small, but so sprawled out it has become the US's largest city area-wise. Subsequently, the idiot city planners of Downtown Phoenix decided to make a fucking mess of the city, not anticipating the growth, making it a nightmare to move from one block to the other, and forgetting to get proper taxis and such. Instead, there is an overpriced light rail that is more or less the governor's toy.

Phoenix is conveniently placed in the damn center of the state, cranking out many ignorantly stupid patriots that are obsessing over border problems, even though they don't live remotely close to the border. It's probably the heat screwing with their heads anyways, since the temperature here can melt the tar in the asphalt. Speaking of which, there's actually vegetation here, surprisingly, but almost all of them are spiky to touch, such as palo verdes or cacti. anything external to the aforementioned plants and a bunch of spiky shrubs is most likely crops planted in the worst place to do so.
Really, there's no example to compare Phoenix, AZ to because no other city is as screwed up as we are.
Phoenix, AZ by friedarizonian December 25, 2010

Phoenix Smores 

Smores (Graham-Cracker and Marshmallow Sandwich) made from the fires of a burning home.
Neil: Someone's house is probably on fire, all I can think about is how that wood fire smells nice. No one's got their chimney going so it's got to be a house fire. I love the smell of arson right before I go to sleep.

Kyle: Where are the marshmallows??

Neil: mmm smores made from the misery of those that lost their home are the BEST.

Kyle: Yeah man, you mean Phoenix Smores!
Phoenix Smores by doublefacepalm October 14, 2010

Phoenix Penis 

When your dick feels like it is eternally on fire, commonly associated with STD's
"I think I got a Phoenix Penis for that bitch last night!"

Phoenix Felix 

When you lick a woman's exposed arm from her wrist to her shoulder.
"How'd it go with Jessica last night?"
"Not bad. We didn't have sex but I was able to give her the ole Phoenix Felix."

Phoenix Suns 

They didn't quit.
Win or lose, the Phoenix Suns fought to the end. Life isn't just about winning for everyone, including even the Milwaukee Bucks who convieniently forgot (their humility) that they didn't win just last year. Even people that hold nothing sacred but winning lose, and thank god for that.

phoenix fire trap 

When a girl puts pepper spray on her vagina, then 10 guys must cum on her pussy to put our the fire. The men must be dressed up in full firefighter gear. Only the heroic few go into the fire to put it out.
Son: Hey guys I just phoenix fire trapped this girl last night
Dad: (overhears) Son i invented the phoenix fire trap.... were you the hero?
Son: Damn right
Dad: (tears up) I'm so proud of you
phoenix fire trap by theburningclam February 13, 2014