crunchy granola

a person who is into all that all natural crap and eats tofu and does yoga and hugs trees... and not in the sexual way

everyone at wesleyan university (excluding Emily and i)

by professor chaos May 23, 2003

fumunda crunchies

The eye goop from a prostitute when she wakes up after a long night of teabagging.

"Dude at least I don't eat Fumunda cruchies for breakfast."

"Fumunda Crunchies, the breakfast of low class scandalous hoes."

by STWW October 29, 2006

Captain Crunch

Demonic cereal that makes you shit rainbows.

KJ: Wanna grab sum Captain Crunch Berries?
Tyrone: Fuck nah! Last time I ate dat shit, mah asshole exploded!

by Bird Gang 😦 October 9, 2017

Malachi Crunch

A wanton attack that involves a two-pronged blitzkrieg by equal forces, converging on an incapacitated target.

"Oh my god, did you hear?! Paulyo was on his vespa riding between two cars on Pine St when he was full on Malachi Crunch(ed). He survived -- his bike's mirrors, not so much!"

by PookieBear123 November 16, 2018

cheesy gordita crunch

A tasty snack from Taco Bell. Made of a hard taco inside a gordita full of cheese.

I went to Taco Bell and ate a cheesy gordita crunch for lunch.

by Dishwasher May 16, 2006

Crunchbite

The great destroyer, an alien named crunchbite. The name was later changed to Fluffy: The alien that only loves.

Caboose: I think I will call him "crunchbite".

Andy: Ahhh, that’s a stupid name.

Caboose: Ahh, well, I think its better than your suggestion, crunchbite is---.

Church: Caboose, who are you talking to---Holy Shit!

Crunchbite: blarg!

by [e-mail] November 26, 2006

Crunchy Nut

When you ejaculate and pass a kidney stone at the same time.

Brittany "Oh my god I was with Zack last night and he gave me a crunchy nut!"
Becky "Omg ew that's so gross'"

by CheddaBiscuit May 12, 2015