Lady: Aahhh! That guy just took my purse!
Guard: He sure did!
Lady: Well, do something, dammit!
Guard: What do you want me to do? Run up and slap him so he can knife me to death? I'm just a paid witness!
Lady: Argh!
Guard: He sure did!
Lady: Well, do something, dammit!
Guard: What do you want me to do? Run up and slap him so he can knife me to death? I'm just a paid witness!
Lady: Argh!
by creaternity May 13, 2006
Get the paid witness mug.A "Fair Witness" is a fictional profession in the book "Stranger in a Strange Land" by Robert A. Heinlein. In the book, Fair Witnesses were individuals trained to see the world around them, as literally as possible, until sensed (see/hear/smell/taste/touch) otherwise.
Another way to describe it would be someone that takes all things sensed as literal as possible & have no reason to believe what they just sensed will remain that way when they are no longer sensing them (seeing/tasting/etc.)
Another way to describe it would be someone that takes all things sensed as literal as possible & have no reason to believe what they just sensed will remain that way when they are no longer sensing them (seeing/tasting/etc.)
An excerpt from the book itself, where the character referenced as "Anne" is an off-duty Fair Witness:
Jubal to Jill: "Even Cavendish did not--at least he won't say so. You know how Fair Witnesses behave."
Jill: "Well...no, I don't. I've never met one."
Jubal to Jill: "So? ANNE!"
Anne was on the springboard; she turned her head. Jubal called out, "That house on the hilltop--can you see what color they've painted it?"
Anne looked, then answered, "It's white on this side."
Jubal went on to Jill: "You see? It doesn't occur to Anne to infer that the other side is white, too. All the King's horses couldn't force her to commit herself...unless she went there and looked--and even then she wouldn't assume that it stayed white after she left."
Jubal to Jill: "Even Cavendish did not--at least he won't say so. You know how Fair Witnesses behave."
Jill: "Well...no, I don't. I've never met one."
Jubal to Jill: "So? ANNE!"
Anne was on the springboard; she turned her head. Jubal called out, "That house on the hilltop--can you see what color they've painted it?"
Anne looked, then answered, "It's white on this side."
Jubal went on to Jill: "You see? It doesn't occur to Anne to infer that the other side is white, too. All the King's horses couldn't force her to commit herself...unless she went there and looked--and even then she wouldn't assume that it stayed white after she left."
by ZoLatKam April 2, 2014
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When someone talks to you and throws you off with distracting information then suddenly reveals their true form and attacks you without any apparent reason. From the video game Dragon Age: Origins.
"Eyes are on you from a very high vantage, Grey Warden. I cannot hide in your wake, and I will not be a footnote! Witness Gaxkang!"
(transforms into an undead boss and starts attacking your party)
(transforms into an undead boss and starts attacking your party)
by Maki_Man November 21, 2009
Get the witness gaxkang mug.You are about to get destroyed physically, mentally, and spiritaully. Generally if this phrase is bellowed out it means the bellower is about to engage in a mass slaughter with absolutly no care for their own safety. Expect no quarter given. Although a relitivly rare act, certain social pressures, neurological ihibitors, or defeat in a video game can cause this.
Vavey: Owned you again!
Dave: Now witness the firepower of this fully ARMED and OPERATIONAL battle station!
Vavey: ohhhh....crap
*Gore everywhere, house destroyed along with neighboring countries
Dave: Now witness the firepower of this fully ARMED and OPERATIONAL battle station!
Vavey: ohhhh....crap
*Gore everywhere, house destroyed along with neighboring countries
by Vavey May 5, 2007
Get the Now witness the firepower of this fully ARMED and OPERATIONAL battle station! mug.When your Facebook is full of a bunch of random friends, you lose control of who sees your information.....so you have to create a new Facebook account where in which you only add your "real friends."
Suzie Q. realized her boss was a friend on her Facebook account, so she couldn't put anything fun up so as not to dis-impress her boss. So, she became one of many to join the new trend of partaking in Facebook's Witness Relocation Program and made a new Facebook and put up all of her crazy pictures and only added her "real friends."
by Train, L July 1, 2009
Get the Facebook's Witness Relocation Program mug.A small, newly formed religion religion that believes This, a newly formed religion, is based on the ideology that Aunt Jemima is an omnipotent being that watches over the stack of pancakes that is the world as we know it. The stack of pancakes represents a multi-layered universe in which the top layer is seen as "heaven"; the middle, earth; and the lower, "hell". The butter on top of the stack is believed to be the very dwelling of Jemima herself! This layer idea is supported loosely by string theory (where multiple universe are layered side by side). It is believed that Mrs. Butterworth resides and rules the Lowest Pancake, where she attempts to thwart Aunt Jemima and all of her syrupy goodness. Mrs.Butterworth is indeed the essence of evil! Last, but certainly not least, we believe that you should "Eat a Better Breakfast "!
by Geshman WG October 13, 2010
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1. (In legal proceedings) the act of a cross examining lawyer being harrassing or combative towards a witness.
2. (slang) male masturbation
1. (In legal proceedings) the act of a cross examining lawyer being harrassing or combative towards a witness.
2. (slang) male masturbation
1. Objection sustained, do not badger the witness.
2. Since I didn't get lucky at the bar, I badgered the witness when i got home.
2. Since I didn't get lucky at the bar, I badgered the witness when i got home.
by Arronos del Pavronos April 2, 2006
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