Topeka, KS

The capital of Kansas where it sucks so bad, that they will pay you 15,000 just to live in the crackhead city. City consist of sex trafficking, dog fighting, drug users, bad drivers, shootings. Don’t go if you don’t want to die.

Just don’t go, just don’t. If you have to, do the following.
1. Don’t be a female at night and go somewhere alone. 9/10 you will be approached by a sex trafficker.
2. Realize that this place is the real life purge. Don’t stare at anyone too long.
3. Don’t leave your dog outside unattended. He may be stolen for bait dog, or they just might kill them for fun.

4. If they look tweaked they probably are. Don’t ask questions. Keep walking.

5. It doesn’t matter where you are. If you are in Topeka, KS you are fair game to being shot. Don’t even drive thru. Go around.

6. Want some sleep? Good fuckin luck. Sirens are on everywhere. They don’t get paid enough for the shit they deal with.

Person 1: hey can you go pick up some milk?
Person 2: fuck no
Person 1: why not?
Person 2: because its fucking Topeka, KS Carol. It 11 pm and I ain’t finna die.

by Ratatatata January 9, 2020

Topee

Head apparel enthusiast, total playa and overall badass. Expert driver but can pilot if necessary. Enjoys excessive speed. Knows importance of Bros before Hoes. Good in bed. However, shit at pool.

Oii slow down, you are driving like a topee

by #bigdickedzak August 30, 2013

Topeka Transit

When two men interlock buttholes, rim to rim, and pass a shit log from one man to the other.

two gay men passing body movements through there ass. this is called the Topeka Transit

by BPCC October 1, 2010

Topeka

The Kansas town that Superman's childhood home, Smallville, was based on.

Metropolis = New York City
Smallville = Topeka

If you're driving from the east coast to Denver the LAST place you can stop and get Starbucks and some CDs from Best Buy before driving several plus hours through wheat, cows, corn, dry grass and more grass. Then more grass.

by Clark Kent April 14, 2005

Topixa

Someone who chews on cock very hard

Devin is such a topixa!

by THE FUCKING UNITED SUPERCLAN January 3, 2019

Pulling a Toper

Attempting to squeeze out what is thought to be a fart, only to realize that it is just slightly too late to hold it back as poo exits your bum. Only qualifies as "a Toper" if done at work.

Man 1: dude, did you hear that fart Ryan just ripped?

Man 2: yeah it sounded REALLY soggy!
Man 1: bro... I think hes "Pulling a Toper"! I call a wipe test!!

by Workplace dumper July 21, 2009

topix wuss

Internet trolls who browse Topix discussion board and use the "Judge It" icons instead of replying to the thread with their actual opinion.

Blogger 1: Hey, did you see that topix wuss who gave everyone a disagree on the Bush topic yesterday but never actually replied to any of the comments directly?

Blogger 2: Yeah. Topix should really get rid of those stupid icons and force people to grow a pair and explain why they disagree or dislike a blogger.

Blogger 1: Yeah, and they should make registration required too, that would stop a lot of this bullshit from happening in the first place!

Blogger 2: No doubt!

by RM in AZ February 20, 2009