theory of everything

Theory of Everything (ToE) is the point in quantum theory Level 4 where the entire data set of everything ever known to exist is resolved in a simple equation: Life = Zero or One (depending on the size of your shaft)

I was bummed out when I my wife died, but then I read about Theory of Everything in hustler magazine.

by Dr. Simulacra October 14, 2013

Theory of Reluctant Bitchitude

A proven theory that implies the fact that all women enjoy the attention that her "lover" gives her, but pretends to not notice in order for said lover to give even more attention to her. Upon this, the "lover" begins to lose interest in her, thinking that she really doesn't care for him, and starts to ignore her. Finally, the woman becomes upset from the lack of attention and desperately seek their lovers attention by any means necisarry.

After said woman becomes desperate, she finally decides to acknowlege her lovers attention and then this cycle starts to repeat itself. The Theory of Reluctant Bitchitude is a proven theory of everyday life.

by Xero _ Manifest January 14, 2011

theory of comparative girls

When a halfway-decent looking girl hangs out with a very unattractive girl in order to make herself look attractive.

"Did you see that picture with Emma last night? She looked so hot!"

"Nah, she's just using the theory of comparative girls to make herself look better by standing next to that fat chick."

by warriorlax1220 November 6, 2011

theory of knowledge

Its somewhere between free period and philosophy. In other words, IB didn't want you to possibly have a free period for half the year, no way, they wanted to fill in that space with another class with a name equivalent to "bull shit." Sometimes for "fun", teachers assign the reading of Sophies World.

Today in Theory of Knowledge, I BSed an 1,500 word paper about math as a way of knowing in 25 minutes!

by s12 January 18, 2009

Theory of Maximum Foolishness

The world will arrange itself to make you--personally--feel maximally foolish.

Murphy's Law is a subset of the Theory of Maximum Foolishness. ML says "Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong." Often, that is true. However, the TOMF says that if something can go RIGHT that would make you look MORE foolish, then that is what will happen.

For example, ML predicts that bread will always fall butter-side down. But, if I TELL YOU it will fall butter-side down, when I go to actually SHOW YOU, the bread will fall butter-side up, making me feel maximally foolish.

The TOMF is true, but neither verifiable nor falsifiable to others because, whatever conditions you establish to test it, only YOU will know if the result made you feel maximally foolish. Of course it will, but only you will know that.

by Two Hep Cats October 16, 2009

Theory of consent

The theory of consent states that the object, person, or animal receiving the fucking must first give permission.

"According to the theory of consent you must first ask that soda can permission before you fuck it."

by Moibus October 23, 2019

Theory of Cuntization

Theory coined by Social Psychologist Kate Cunty theorizing that humans are giving cunt exponentially more due to social matters. She stated that people are more inclined to serve cunt when social pressures are higher, also discussing the matter of the Cuntization Prioritization (how the social situation determines how much someone prioritizes serving cunt). Researchers that had later done studies on the Theory of Cuntization claimed that although Kate Cunty's theory was correct regarding Cuntization Prioritization, they found that people serve cunt statistically more due to internal factors rather that external (social) factors.

"Oh my god, I just got a call from Lucas and he said that instead of taking me to the movie theater, we are going to a museum for our date. Now I have to serve cunt!"

"No way... thank god you can prioritize serving cunt in time. Maybe Kate Cunty was right about her Theory of Cuntization!"

by Kate Cunty October 4, 2023