rapture bunny

A dogmatic follower of End-Times or Armageddon Christianity, otherwise known as dispensationalism begun by John Darby in early 1800s England.

The Reverend John Hagee is the chief rapture bunny in the U.S.

by Dave Stern September 23, 2006

Goat Rapture

The Goat Rapture is like the Rapture movie, but instead of people being sucked into the sky, the goats of the world are slowly disappearing.

*goat noise slowly drifts upwards*

Will: Hey, James did you here that?

James: Don't worry it's probably just the impending doom of the Goat Rapture.

Will: Oh, never mind then.

by TeamCade May 13, 2016

anal rapture

a case of extreme explosive diarrhea; usually caused by excessive ingestion of chili.

Don't go in the bathroom for a while. The anal rapture caused by the three scoops of chili at Mongolian Barbeque is going to need some time!

by Travoltine January 13, 2009

Raptor Jesus

Raptor Jesus appeared before me, and he said: "Take heed my son, for there shall be many who doubt me, but whosoever believeth in me shall have everlasting life." I wept with joy at the gift bestowed, "Yet, my lord, what fate shall be given to the unworthy?" He answered: "Their entrails shall be rent from their stomachs, their limbs ripped from their torso, to feast our hungry bodies, and restore our souls. Whensoever you feast upon the heart of thine enemy, think of me." For that is the beauty of Raptor Jesus.

One day, Raptor Jesus walked a busy street with his disciple, Anonymous. Anonymous and his like-named brethren populated the land on which they strolled, as common as blades of grass. They walked, discussing many things, but, Anonymous paused for a moment. “Lord?” he spoke, “Is not this idle talk frowned upon by your father?” And quoth Raptor Jesus; “All voice communicates knowledge. Knowledge is hardly frowned upon by anyone, and thus your ‘idle talk’ does not exist, unless you speak of memes. Memes are idle, as they are merely communication of things all know of” And thus our Lord beckoned to a painting of an insanely smiling man. “However, memes can bring laughter and happiness, thus, one can surmise that He enjoys them, and hardly frowns upon them” And Anonymous looked ahead, silent.

by Anon Divad January 2, 2008

Raptor Snatch

1. To grab or steal an object so quickly while yelling "RAPTOR SNATCH" that the victim does not have time to react and usally is extremely embarrassed.

"Man, he totally raptor snatched my cigarette out of my mouth"

by bitboy36 December 20, 2008

Rapturbation

Due to the near unanswerable question of "What is it called if you rape you're own clone? Rape or masturbation?" a new word has been invented to answer this question.

I totally rapturbated last night.

Rapturbation? Is that legal?

by IXTakaXI October 18, 2009

Raptor Math

The act of mathematically determining your survival time should a velociraptor begin an attack at that very moment.

“Check my Raptor Math, here, but I think we'd have a 2.3 second survival time if a raptor came through that window.”

by Skudworth February 4, 2012