jerkoff-mobile

A very complex machine utilizing a combination of torsional motion and varying stresses and strains, implemented by a complex system of pulleys and hydraulic levers. The system, operating at an astronomical 72% efficiency, is perfect for thermodynamic calculations, maximizing the output of the internal combustion engine, cooking eggs, and jerking off chodes.

Dude1) "Did you finish calibrating the hydrolic pressure meter on the jerkoff-mobile?"

Dude2) "No, but I busted a giant load..."

by Brooks Brothers February 2, 2007

Elimination Jerkoff

When a group of men elect someone from the group to do a task that none of them want to do. This involves the group of men to get naked lay down on their backs in a circle, then (in a clockwise fashion) the first gets hard and "eliminates" the guy next to him all over his face, and so on.

Guy 1: Alright guys someone has to go watch that jennifer garner movie with her.

Guy 2: Only one way to settle this, elimination jerkoff!

by mark86 May 30, 2009

Jerkoff

someone who is a complete prick, but at the same time manages to be a loser and a flamer.

man, what a jerkoff he is.

by me March 12, 2003

jerkoff juice

Crude slang for liquid personal lubrication products such as Astroglide.

Nah, I spent the night in with a bottle of jerkoff juice.

by eslampiece December 20, 2006

Jerksprout

A person who is being a jerk in a very immature, childish manner.

He didn't like my opinion in the discussion so he went through dozens of my previous posts and made negative comments on them like a little jerksprout.

by RX0 January 24, 2013

jerkolive

a crazy clown who drinks and tells people to fook off

getting drunk with make up on and telling people to fook off is jerkolive

by sixpac1965 January 10, 2014

Jerkoff Litmus Test

The act of masturbating before deciding whether or not you will make social contact with a girl. Performing this test lets you make sure you're thinking with the correct head before proceeding to talk-to/meet-with a girl that you would otherwise regret making contact with.

After doing a jerkoff litmus test I realized that more than half of the female contacts in my phone are worthless.

by jerkoff_tester December 7, 2012