beating the bishop

Masturbating.

How many times a day do you beat your bishop?

by chronicmasturbator March 27, 2003

beating the record

'Beating the record' is a phrase referring to one attempting to 'beat' the number of times they can masturbate in 24 hours.

'Beating' is a pun, synonymous for masturbating.

My current record is nine.

Carl lied about beating the record yesterday.

by Harry Boulding January 12, 2009

Betina

She's the cute introverted girl who always gives way more than she gets back. She loves to make others smile, and is usually very crafty. She has a beauty she can't see for herself.

"she always gives away what she makes! She must be a Betina."

by Pumpquins January 9, 2014

beating a dead horse

It doesn't matter how much you want to continue riding beating a dead horse is not going to get you anywhere.

If something is already done and over with there is no point in still talking about it.

If something is already broken there is no point in trying to use it.

Someone breaks up with there girl/boyfriend and continues to bitch about them to there friends weeks later. That person is beating a dead horse, the relationship is over there is no point in thinking about it since the matter is already resolved with you having broken up.

Relationship = dead horse
Bitching about it = beating it

Trying over and over to start your car after you've been in an accident where it is clear that the car is not going to work.

Broken Car = dead horse
Trying to start it = beating it

by Bradley Groot February 19, 2008

beating around the bush

being indirect in conversation

please stop beating around the bush and cut to the chase: what the fuck do you want?

by save November 18, 2002

Beating Peter

to masturbate. other terms are bashing the candle, Bleeding the weasel, bleedin the weed, buffing the banana, bopping the baloney, burping the worm, choking the chicken, cleaning your rifle, corking the bat, cranking the shank, cuffing the carrot, fisting your mister, flogging your dog, floggin the frog, flogging the hog, flogging the log, flute solo, jerkin'the gherkin, looping the mule, manual override, painting the pickle, pocket pinball, pocket pool, polishing the banister, polishing the rocket, pounding your flounder, pumping the python, roping the pony, spanking the monkey, teasing the weasel, tossing the turkey, walking the dog, whipping the willy, wonking your cronker, yanking the crank.

Dale was caught beating peter on the toilet by his mother.

by vander-dale May 17, 2009

spread betting

A good way of losing thousands of Euros in double quick time by backing financial or sports markets to either rise or fall. You bet a (relatively) small amount per point of the index which can fluctuate by hundreds (or if you are (un)lucky thousands) of points within a few weeks. On the plus side, you can open and close your bet at any time - sometimes you might open a position which you could hold on to for as long as 3 or 4 months. If there is rapid activity in your favoured direction, you might get out within hours and take a small profit.

Two examples of spread betting:

1. Dow Jones 'March 2007' might have a spread as follows 11200-11215. If you think the market will go up you buy at 215 hoping it will end anywhere higher than this. If conversely you think that the market will go back into the 10,000s you 'Sell' and wait for the market to fall before closing your position.

2. Cricket bet. England 2nd innings of the 4th Test vs Pakistan. The spread might be something like 295-305. If you think England will score 400+ you might buy this position at 1 Euro per run. If they score 405 you win 100 Euros.

by Jonathan FeBland (Znethru) August 18, 2006