worthless suburbanite who comes to the city on weekends, hangs out at Fireside, then sits on curb at Dunkin Donuts at Clark and Belmont wishing he/she were cool enough and/or affluent enough to actually live in the area.
by Pegboy October 2, 2003
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A person, often an adult in their 40s or 50s, who resides in any suburb of a major city and holds the firm belief everything they and their family need is in their suburb and others surrounding it and rarely, if ever, venture into the core city, either out of fear of being a victim of a crime (even if they live near a city with low crime rates) or out of contempt for the cities mostly liberal/open-minded view points that clash with their staunch conservative ideas.
Militant suburbanites are not very common in communities within 15 miles of the core city and make up less than half a metro area's population, but they are not common to spot, as they feel the need to conform to whatever their neighbors and/or coworkers are doing. Militant Suburbanites that do venture into the city usually tend to stick to the most crowded areas of the city and will avoid any form of public transportation.
Militant suburbanites are not very common in communities within 15 miles of the core city and make up less than half a metro area's population, but they are not common to spot, as they feel the need to conform to whatever their neighbors and/or coworkers are doing. Militant Suburbanites that do venture into the city usually tend to stick to the most crowded areas of the city and will avoid any form of public transportation.
There are three levels of Militant Suburbanite:
Level 1-most willing to venture into a core city, though only do so for certain occasions, usually being sporting events, some concerts and conventions/trade shows/conferences, travel (driving through in a car, heading to the airport, etc.) and work, if their job is in the city. All other entertainment and shopping they feel can be done in the suburbs.
Level 2-will venture into the core city from time to time, but usually only for work and travel
Level 3-rarest of all. Is absolutely not willing to venture into the core city at all. They will go out of their way to not find a job there and will even refuse to drive through there on the highway.
Level 1-most willing to venture into a core city, though only do so for certain occasions, usually being sporting events, some concerts and conventions/trade shows/conferences, travel (driving through in a car, heading to the airport, etc.) and work, if their job is in the city. All other entertainment and shopping they feel can be done in the suburbs.
Level 2-will venture into the core city from time to time, but usually only for work and travel
Level 3-rarest of all. Is absolutely not willing to venture into the core city at all. They will go out of their way to not find a job there and will even refuse to drive through there on the highway.
by GaaraoftheDamned September 19, 2013
Get the militant suburbanite mug.1. A condition whereby any metropolitan area has its crime statistics exponentially increased or embellished by a person whose residence has fallen outside said area for at least three-quarters of their life.
2. Rarely visiting a city because of an irrational fear or stubborn ignorance.
2. Rarely visiting a city because of an irrational fear or stubborn ignorance.
After visiting Toronto, Matt felt encouraged and qualified to bash Detroit despite his embarrassing case of suburbanitis.
by Joshua Gillis August 3, 2008
Get the Suburbanitis mug.Pronounced U-burbanite, from suburbanite.
Students of a large university, or residents of the surrounding area, whose lives (whether or not they like it) are impacted by the U on a daily basis.
Inspired by the University of Minnesota's annoying habit of using the capital letter "U" whenever possible, up to the point of subsituting it for the word "you" whenever possible. This author is sure that other universities have a similar tendancies, but she has not experienced them.
Students of a large university, or residents of the surrounding area, whose lives (whether or not they like it) are impacted by the U on a daily basis.
Inspired by the University of Minnesota's annoying habit of using the capital letter "U" whenever possible, up to the point of subsituting it for the word "you" whenever possible. This author is sure that other universities have a similar tendancies, but she has not experienced them.
The Uburbanites are up in arms about the new stadium proposal.
The Uburbanites mobbed the University's office, demanding the return of the word "you."
The Uburbanites mobbed the University's office, demanding the return of the word "you."
by Lady Chevalier May 26, 2005
Get the uburbanite mug.When one has little to no conflict in their life to which they can rise to the occasion, that is build moral character through strife, they will begin creating problems. This disease, if you will, plagues the suburban regions of every state, often manifesting itself in young teens as well as middle-aged men going through identity crises, shallow trophy wives, tennis/soccer moms, parents obsessed with their child's sport or scout troop, etc. are all also examples of "adults" with Suburbanitus.
It's sister disease is Urbanitus, creating strife from boredom through petty crime, gangs, etc.
Such diseases hint to an underdeveloped maturity in thought, leading to the illogical use of excessive, unjustified emotion. Perhaps the saddest thing about Suburbanitus is the cure. Only life threatening situations in which one clearly sees how shallow their lives are given the prominent and very real threat of death can overcome the disease.
It's sister disease is Urbanitus, creating strife from boredom through petty crime, gangs, etc.
Such diseases hint to an underdeveloped maturity in thought, leading to the illogical use of excessive, unjustified emotion. Perhaps the saddest thing about Suburbanitus is the cure. Only life threatening situations in which one clearly sees how shallow their lives are given the prominent and very real threat of death can overcome the disease.
John: Hey Sally, want to hang out with me and Carol tonight?
Sally: Why do you choose her over me?
John: I'm not, I'm saying we should all hang out...
Sally: (bawls)
John: Bawwwwliin! Sally has the worst case of Suburbanitus. She just runs around causing problems and creating drama. She needs to grow up and quit acting like a child.
Sally: Why do you choose her over me?
John: I'm not, I'm saying we should all hang out...
Sally: (bawls)
John: Bawwwwliin! Sally has the worst case of Suburbanitus. She just runs around causing problems and creating drama. She needs to grow up and quit acting like a child.
by Blake Tipton April 20, 2008
Get the Suburbanitus mug.by Gus the Goat June 21, 2008
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