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Paperweight

I can’t believe Mimi is with David - he’s so the paperweight in the relationship.
by BootyInspector February 6, 2018
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Paperweight partner

A person that you are in a relationship with that doesn't actually do what a romantic relationship entails. They don't care for you emotionally, unironically using the term "emotional labor" as a turn-off. They neither cook nor clean. They may offer sex and they may look pretty for you, but that's it. This isn't love.

Hence the word "paperweight," a pretty thing that is actually useless.
Cardi B: "I don't cook, I don't clean, but let me tell you how I got this ring!"
Me: "Isn't this just glorifying being a paperweight partner?"
by Pylot November 22, 2022
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Corporate paperweight

An employee who adds no value to a company but still gets a paycheck.
That 60 year old guy who don't know how to use computers that works in the it department is a corporate paperweight.

In the movie Office Space Milton is a corporate paperweight.
by Chaosmirage December 28, 2016
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paperweight

1.a useless or broken piece of equipment, especially electronic equipment

2. a serious student
by The return of Light Joker January 21, 2011
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Paperweight

When a Male take a piss with his penis out but his balls behind the elastic bands of his pants.
John paperweight when he takes a piss
by WordFinder October 11, 2008
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Paperweighting

When a bureaucracy reaches a level of red tape such that it runs in a full circle.

Usually involving a lot of "not my department" and ending, after much effort, back where one began in the process.

This occurs at such a level that not only does it benefit no-one, but it actually costs everyone in the chain.

The term derives from the subjective feeling of unnecessary, nonsensical paperwork actually crushing your chest like a weight, effecting breathing.
1. "Government made emergency funds available for a crisis,

but the b*tches are still paperweighting me; Ima bout t kills a b*atch"

2. Phone call-Line-form-line-phone call-"Charlene"-office in person-line-processing-ID required-lost-relodge-office-line-phone-form-online form-deletion for reapply form-months delay-enquiry form-phone-"Charlene-form..."
by DrJJRhc February 13, 2013
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Electronic paperweight

1. When your phone is in a place where it doesn't have service.

2. When your phone has been cut off due to lack-of-phone-bill-pay
1.
Guy 1: Dude, want to go camping?
Guy 2: Sure, but I'm not bringing my cell phone
Guy 1: Why not, bro?
Guy 2: The lake is a dead zone... My phone is an electronic paperweight up there

2.
Guy 1: Brosef, I tried calling you yesterday but it went straight to voicemail... Turn your phone on!
Guy 2: It is on, but I forgot to pay my phone bill. My phone's an electronic paperweight right now
by Dave-Landon October 11, 2011
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