Jesus Bless You

A phrase commonly said when someone sneezes in the presence of a christ killer, to bring guilt to their souls for their terrible actions.

*Jew walks into the room*
Billy: ACHOOOO!
Everyone else: JESUS BLESS YOU!

by Kaspermacus May 6, 2011

Jesus fucking christ

A statement of pure, raw, and utter disbelief. Usually used when you see something absolutely fucking cursed and you can't think of anything asides from "Jesus Fucking Christ."

"So, bro. Did you hear about the whole accident where that kid blew up an entire fucking supermarket?"

"..."

"Bro, you okay?"

"Jesus Fucking Christ.

by RiceOfCourse November 26, 2022

Jesus Christ on a crutch!

Simply means, "O fuck!" or, "O shit!".

Jesus Christ on a crutch! you shouldn't have done that.

by Telephony2 June 29, 2023

jesus jerk off

After finishing nonutnovember and glancing at the picture of Jesus being crucified you immediately cream your jimmies. Such an event happens ounce every blue moon and is usually followed by an isis beheading.

Damn bro I had a jesus jerk off last night I was cleaning it up for hours.

by Overitus_Manhadalitus February 5, 2018

seeing Jesus in the toast

to see a pattern of something that is not really there or not formed by your believed cause.

Alex is really seeing Jesus in the toast when he claims that the Illuminati are communicating through magazine covers.

by Citation Puffin January 10, 2015

Jesus my friend

If you ever meet someone named Jesus your very lucky he is always there for you and he is always tryna play fight he is very strong loyal and when you in a bad situation he will help you so that’s what a great friend is.

Jesus my friend

by zDeagleX January 6, 2019

50 shades of jesus

A sex story between Jesus and his followers made by a sinning fuck face. and who also wants to piss of his/her parents because they are christian.

Hey did you read the sequel of 50 shades of Jesus? "50 more shades of jesus"

by Blue_Amore June 8, 2018