Self Defense

When somebody who's on MY side shoots someone, but not when it's somebody on YOUR side!

Person 1 : "Yeah, Person 4 shot Person 56 in self defense because he came at Person 4 with a knife."
Person 2 : "Oh, shame. I hope he's okay."
Person 1 : "Oh yeah, Person 5 shot Person 78 because he did the same thing."
Person 2: "Person 5? Isn't he one of those OdD nUmBeR people? Crazy how murderers get away with anything in this country.."
Person 1: "What"

by LordHookie April 28, 2022

Polar bear defense

When your getting mauled be a polar bear and you only have once option left. Stick your finger or fingers or fist is his anal cavity. This could result in three outcomes. 1- the polar bear doesn't like it and thinks your gay so he runs away. 2- the polar bear does like it so backs up to u and gives u the option to fuck him or die. You fuck him he let's u free. 3- he doesn't like or is offended by it and kills you on the spot. Which isn't all that bad cuz if you make him more mad he will kill you faster instead of dragging it out.

A man who had heard of Polar bear defense jumped in the polar bear pit and the zoo to swim with the polar bears and they weren't happy. He used polar bear defense and the polar bear let him fuck him Now he is a star on pornhub.

by cletus cccccccccccccccccho October 22, 2017

Totally normal tower defense gaem

Sus roblox gaem

Guy1:Hey what do you think of totally normal tower defense gaem?
Guy2:kinda sus if youre gonna ask me

by Totally not BelowNatural August 23, 2021

Windows Defender

By far the worst antivirus ever. The Windows defender dev team spent all of its project money on making their half baked peice of shit turn back on after you disable it, damn near impossible to delete, and requiring you to use registry data to disable it instead of making it good.

I turned off windows defender but the fucker turned back on by itself and deleted every program that tried to access any file

by big gunline December 21, 2020

The Kevin Spacey defense

When you get called on doing something illegal or deplorable and come out as gay to deflect blame.

I hear that crazy guy that killed a bunch of people used the Kevin Spacey defense. What a hero.

by Keksperanto November 2, 2017

Defenestrate

To throw someone or something out of a window

"I will defenestrate you and your mouth organ if you carry on" said tom

by Mrtys May 30, 2006

postmodern Public Defender

Some poor schmuck was given the sad job of defending poor private fools against acts of larceny perpetrated by the entirety of the general public. He seldom has the integrity to look his client in the eyes because he knows the public always treads on the private.

The importance we place on justice can always be measured by the amount of resources given to the postmodern Public Defender in proportion to the amount of resources given to the Attorney General.

by Spiritual-Master December 10, 2021