snuggle soft

Comfortably soft (e.g., pillows and blankets fresh from the dryer). See snuggly.

The couch was so snuggle soft that I fell asleep in ten minutes.

by Ingeborg S. Nordén May 31, 2006

crushin' softies

Is a term of art used to describe a methodology employed by the US Military in an effort to siphon out homosexuals from service in response to the apparent lack of success of federal statute 10 U.S.C. § 654, or more commonly referred to as the "Don't ask, Don't tell" policy. If a male serving in any military branch is suspected of engaging in homosexual activity, they will be called before there superior officer and asked to crush softies with one of there peers. To "crush" the suspected gay will pull out his penis and press it against the penis of his crushing partner. The idea is that the male's penis will remain flaccid and non-erect when pressed against the other male's wiener if he straight, thus proving his true sexuality. However if his penis becomes erect (a boner), the male has failed the test, and undoubtedly likes to sex other males in the fanny, thus precluding him from further military service. (Other words/phrases synonymous with the test include: "the crush game", "bumpin' soft-dick", "hamin' sandies" and "Captain Crunchin"). A similar test has been used to target homosexual females, known as "crushin' tits", however results are generally understood as unreliable due to varying room temperatures and the fact that no one cares if hoes wanna scissor each other.

Soldier: "Lieutenant Nilbog I've got some serious news. Private Johnson just got walked in on making a spinach dip in a loaf of sourdough bread and listening to Coldplay!"

Lieutenant: "Holy fuck. Go get Johnson immediately and bring him in here. You two are gonna be crushin' softies till we get to the bottom of this."

by General Goblincock April 14, 2010

Softboy

Similar to a fuckboy but without the cocky attitude. The Softboy will butter a girl up by appealing to her emotions and showing a "sensitive" side long enough for her to sleep with him, whether or not he actually cares about her or not. Then, like the fuckboy, he can't/won't commit. Differs from the fuckboy because he goes for the heart and emotions rather than just the body.

The Softboy played me like the Fuckboy did, but at least the fuckboy was honest.

by asa086 April 15, 2016

Soft-on

The opposite of a hard-on; when a penis is not erect and its size is unpredictable.

I had a boner, but then I thought of Susan Boyles naked, and it became a soft-on again.

by Tikibarberfan March 10, 2010

Swoftie

a female over the age of fifty who is single and loving the fact that they are single

P1: look at that swoftie
P2: she looks like she's having fun being single at that age

by Jedi418 January 3, 2013

Soft-dressing

A soft-core version of cross-dressing, where a person adds a couple of feminine/masculine items to their outfit to create a semi-androgynous appearance

Is... is Bobby wearing women's lingerie?? I think I can see it creeping out of his backside!" "Yes. He's into soft-dressing didn't y'know.

by FuturePoet September 12, 2010

soft liquor

Soft liquor is off-brand rum, vodka, whisky or other distilled spirits not good enough to drink neat (or mix with gasoline as motor fuel), mixed with sugar not good enough to feed to livestock, poured into gaily coloured bottles and marketed to people who can't or won't drink real liquor. Typical trade names are "Amaretto," "Southern Comfort," "Malibu," and any of the rash (I use the term advisedly) of flavored "vodkas" inflicted on the drinking public. Just about the only liquor made BETTER by mixing with Coke.

"You don't want to go in there... our wives and three other women from their secretarial pool have been guzzling soft liquor all evening, and they're talking about dressing us up like Chippendales... "

by Cajun Scientist March 5, 2013