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Fact of the Matter

Phrase used by morons to transition from one confusing sentence clause to another. Often used when said moron has absolutely no clue what he or she is speaking about and is engaged in an argumentative conversion. When properly used, the moron--through his own stupidity--renders his conversing opponent speechless and effectively ends the conversation. Consequentially, the moron now believes he is smart and begins to use the phrase more often; making everyone who knows the moron hate him and dread talking to him.
reasonably intelligent person: "The consensus among dietitians is that you should eat solid food and that a diet consisting of mere protein shakes is a crash diet that cannot be sustained for long-term, healthy weight loss."

moron: "Well, I am no scientist and I sure as hell won't be called Tom Cruise, but the fact of the matter is I've lost ten pounds in two weeks on my shake diet and its totally kick ass. Do you even realize that I put ice in the shake and its a solid?"

reasonable intelligent person: "You are a moron"
by how to talk to idiots March 5, 2011
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faceturbation

the act of masturbating to your friends' pictures on facebook.
craigbot was caught with his pants down on facebook commiting faceturbation.
by Loyalservant563 December 9, 2007
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Related Words

Facetwat

n. One who annoyingly posts a Facebook status multiple times an hour, often resembling a tweet.
John: Dammit! I'm sick of getting updates every time Jessica dillyfucks around!

Billy: She's such a Facetwat
by Foohtube October 5, 2010
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Facetoast

The ultimate burn. When someone burns someone else, they have commited "Facetoast".
Friend: Dude, I heard you have a small ****!

You: That's not what your mom said

This is a perfect example of "Facetoast".
by La Chupacabra September 1, 2005
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facoterie

tending to or exhibiting reckless playfulness.
*Informal or slang
Facoterie on drinking the last beer!
by alex and elysia February 3, 2007
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facetime pose

Similar to the famed "MySpace Pose", but on Apple's new iPhone. Involves holding the phone at an elevated level from the subject during video calling, so as to make them look better.
Dude with iphone: Kelly's trying to video call me!
Other dude: Quick, son hit up the facetime pose!
Dude with iphone (raising phone above his head and pushing talk): Oh! Hey Kelly. What chu doin?
by ngiardina June 27, 2010
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Fact Jew

Fact Jew is a more socially accepted way of saying 'F*** you'.
It derives from the way an iOS device corrects the words 'F*** you' when being typed. Contrary to popular belief, there is no 'fiction jew' as that would just be preposterous.
"Hey Henry, we're going to the shopping centre without you"
"Why do you have to do this to me? Fact Jew!

"Hey Henry, we've decided that you can't come with us to town"
"Why do you have to do this to me? Fact Jew!"
by sahimster September 2, 2012
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