Atheist

A person who holds a positive religious belief in a spontaneous, causeless, sourceless, purposeless and objectively meaningless existence.

Existentially, they often believe that at the origin of the Universe there was nothing, and that nothing exploded - creating everything; before a bunch of everything magically rearranged itself, for no reason whatsoever, into inexplicably self-replicating parts, which eventually developed into intelligent beings with inexplicable (or at least incomprehensible) capacities for reason, ethical judgement and aesthetic awareness...

As Xenocrates stated; “Without proof, belief is still belief – even if you believe in nothing.”

Some atheists of renown include Mao Tse Tung, Pol Pot and Stalin.

by Mindless Philistine September 5, 2010

Atheist

Someone who doesn’t believe in a higher power or god-like figure. Atheists are often unfairly stereotyped because they don’t believe in the same things as religious people. In fact, atheists are some of the most tolerant people out there. You see Christians hating on atheists and claiming it’s because they “follow the path of the devil”. How many Christians do you know that cuss? I’m an atheist, and I have never uttered a curse word in my entire life. Please stop this unfair hatred. I’m just believing in what I think is true, just like you.

Religious person: “You’re a (curse word) atheist? You must be a (curse word) terrible person”
Me: “At least I’m not cussing at you because you aren’t an atheist”

by Atheist2003 June 6, 2018

Atheist

Adj. A person who is angry at, and no longer believes in any God because they didn't get what they wanted on their birthday or on a Christmas early in their life.

Little Johnny: God! Why didn't I get a Super Nintendo for Christmas?! I hate you! I'm an atheist now!

or

Young Adult Josh: God! Why didn't I get a MacBook Pro?! Now I can't be better than all those PC users at school! I hate you! From here on I'm an Atheist

by truththe57 August 17, 2010

Atheist

A a person who believes that God does not exist.

An atheist counsels his fellow non-believers on how not to talk to people of faith.

by JoshuaXiong April 2, 2019

Atheist

A human who does not believe in a sentient being capable of modifying the fundamental rules of physics and the universe (Also known as a god). Often, the term is used in contrast to the term Theist or Creationist.

An Atheist is not something you put on a sandwich.

by No one of consequence August 21, 2014

Atheist

One of these applies to you:
1. You are an atheist looking to further your atheism (and you are offended by theism), thus you looked up atheism.
2. You are a theist, therefore you looking to further your theism (and you are offended by atheism), thus you looked up atheism

John is an atheist therefor he wants to learn more about it.
Jack is a theist therefor he wants to learn more about atheism.

Moral of story...learn stuff.

by Cliff Whitty August 21, 2006

atheists

1.One who is without religion
Despite common belief by stupid people, Athiests are not satanists nor are satanists athiests. Speaking as a Satanist we do not believe in god because we do not believe in any of the lie you have created for yourself. We do not believe that satan is a fallen angel or that other angels exist and there for no god. Its quite simple we believe that the race we worshipped as gods in Egypt, and many other early civilizations.

"Doesnt john want some mass?" "Naw hes one of them atheists folk"

by Jeff Negus April 9, 2006