by Beef Stu October 8, 2003
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One hundred percent of women and all the bearded effeminates slowly replacing the real men of the world. Cooter carriers either can't grow a pair (literally, in the case of females) or had their balls busted during adolescence. Cooter carriers lack manly attributes such as courage, humor, a sense of justice and fair play, and the ability to withstanding pressure in adverse situations. Only real men have these traits.
Their biggest fear is how others will perceive them which constantly keeps them on the edge. That's why all the cooter carriers herd together on Instagram, liking each other's frivolous posts. Because they're too damn scared to live alone. Real men like me never give a fuck what others are thinking about us.
Cooter carriers like to constantly whine, complain, and assail you when they have the numbers to back them up.
If all else fails, they will give you the silent treatment. They started the whole #metoo nonsense framing innocent men for acting on their sexual impulses.
Cooter carriers openly hate us men for being men, but secretly admire our manliness. Why not - manliness is next to Godliness, and so every cooter carrier wants to be just like us. They burn with penis envy. Sorry for you beautiful gals and their unmasculine pals, you're all called pussies for a reason. The Lord created you that way because He is a Man and we real men are the only chosen ones who've been made in His divine image.
Their biggest fear is how others will perceive them which constantly keeps them on the edge. That's why all the cooter carriers herd together on Instagram, liking each other's frivolous posts. Because they're too damn scared to live alone. Real men like me never give a fuck what others are thinking about us.
Cooter carriers like to constantly whine, complain, and assail you when they have the numbers to back them up.
If all else fails, they will give you the silent treatment. They started the whole #metoo nonsense framing innocent men for acting on their sexual impulses.
Cooter carriers openly hate us men for being men, but secretly admire our manliness. Why not - manliness is next to Godliness, and so every cooter carrier wants to be just like us. They burn with penis envy. Sorry for you beautiful gals and their unmasculine pals, you're all called pussies for a reason. The Lord created you that way because He is a Man and we real men are the only chosen ones who've been made in His divine image.
Female Boss, "I told you to get the payment refunded to our client by Friday-end. What happened? He just sent me an angry email threatening to sue our company."
Real Man employee: "Have you seen all the chat messages I left you? I even scanned the 4-page refund letter and converted it to a PDF file. All you had to do was digitally authorize the payment."
Female boss: "Oh,,,,oh. My phone's not working. You should have sent me that in person."
Real Man employee: "I would have if I knew where to find you."
Female boss: "OK...whatever. Be more careful next time."
Real Man employee: "I will. Now get lost you cooter carrier."
Female boss: "What did you just call me?"
---
Me: "Wow, that's a hot girl. Damn check the rack on that one. Missionary would be too nice for her. I just want to do her doggy style, put my hands down the front of her cooter, and slowly move my palms to squeeze her tits..."
Bearded Mangina : "Dude, that's not cool. You're doing so much objectifying here. Women are equal to us men in every way. The way you described that person is abominable. You should never demean women but should always esteem and protect them. And 'cooter' - that's such a disrespectful word. What you just did is called sexual harassment. You give the rest of us men a bad name."
Me: "Shut the hell up, you cooter carrier."
Real Man employee: "Have you seen all the chat messages I left you? I even scanned the 4-page refund letter and converted it to a PDF file. All you had to do was digitally authorize the payment."
Female boss: "Oh,,,,oh. My phone's not working. You should have sent me that in person."
Real Man employee: "I would have if I knew where to find you."
Female boss: "OK...whatever. Be more careful next time."
Real Man employee: "I will. Now get lost you cooter carrier."
Female boss: "What did you just call me?"
---
Me: "Wow, that's a hot girl. Damn check the rack on that one. Missionary would be too nice for her. I just want to do her doggy style, put my hands down the front of her cooter, and slowly move my palms to squeeze her tits..."
Bearded Mangina : "Dude, that's not cool. You're doing so much objectifying here. Women are equal to us men in every way. The way you described that person is abominable. You should never demean women but should always esteem and protect them. And 'cooter' - that's such a disrespectful word. What you just did is called sexual harassment. You give the rest of us men a bad name."
Me: "Shut the hell up, you cooter carrier."
by Third World Sam March 10, 2023
Get the cooter carrier mug.The true badass hijacker, alias D.B. Cooper. Took over a plane on Thanksgiving, 1971, with the threat of a bomb in his briefcase. Ordered the plane land, had officials hand him $100000 in cash, then let the passengers off without a scratch. He then ordered the plane take off, and while flying over some mountains the crew heard the cargo hatch open. Cooper strapped the money to his chest, grabbed a parachute and leapt off into the stormy night. He was never seen again, dead or alive, eluding one of the greatest FBI manhunts in history.
The true American hero to many, rather than a dirty thief. He was reportedly quite civil and friendly to his hostages, even offering them drinks. A real-life James Bond.
The true American hero to many, rather than a dirty thief. He was reportedly quite civil and friendly to his hostages, even offering them drinks. A real-life James Bond.
Guy 1: Yo man do you think D.B. Cooper is alive?
Guy 2: Hell yeah he is, probably sipping martinis on a Caribbean island right now, laughing at all of us. He's da fucking shit.
Guy 2: Hell yeah he is, probably sipping martinis on a Caribbean island right now, laughing at all of us. He's da fucking shit.
by thegreatsandwich August 16, 2008
Get the d.b. cooper mug.Cooper is tee most amazing guy you will ever meet. He has all the girls crushing on him, and he flirts with them too. But he usually is only thinking about one girl all the time, the girl he truly cares for. If you hurt the people he loves, then you better watch your back. He’s the class clown, who can make a person smile within a few seconds of talking to them. Cooper has a dark secret on the inside, but covers up the sadness with his humour. His blue eyes and blonde hair have the girls come running. If you ever meet a Cooper, NEVER let him go for as long as you live. Love Cooper with everything you have.
by Snak3yWak3y March 17, 2020
Get the Cooper mug.This phrase is an adjective used to describe someone who's demeanor is so cool that if you don't like them, there is something wrong with you; a literal description based on waking up at night, flipping your pillow, and the coolness making you feel so good you fall back to sleep.
by Cunninglinguist69 September 9, 2008
Get the cooler than the other side of the pillow mug.1) Alice Cooper has been in music for almost 40 years....and he STILL ROCKS!!
2)school's out, kiddies.
3)dead babies
2)school's out, kiddies.
3)dead babies
by 19.... May 22, 2006
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