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Coffee Lag

The duration between the first sip of coffee and the body's reaction to caffeine. Generally, the speaker forces actions/words to come out faster than neural transmission without the aid of a catalyst (i.e., caffeine).

Though applicable throughout the workday, coffee lag is especially perilous during the early hours, such as the morning commute, team meetings, and pseudo-serious conversations about life.

Symptoms include rambling speech, awkward gestures, and grand delusions of vacation (often resembles daydreaming). Note: coffee lag in an attractive person can be misdiagnosed as a hot mess.
Bob: "...and-when-I-go-to-desk-I-make-copies-of-things-where-I-think-that-we-need-to-see-more-of-each-other-and-I-know-you-like-me-but-I'm-still-working-and-need-more-time-to-get-these-forms-back-to-you..."

Jane: "So what I think what you're saying is that you need a deadline extension...?"

Bob: (sips coffee)

Jane: "I'll just come back after your coffee lag wears off."
by TexicanAg01 December 8, 2010
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coffee poaching

The act of pulling out the coffee pot in mid-brew and letting it drip into your cup. This is a common office foul that either dilutes the entire batch of coffee for the rest of the office or caused it to be much more robust.
Kevin's been coffee poaching again. This batch taste watered down!
by twowheeler1300 April 25, 2011
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Coffee and a muffin before bed

A euphemism for sex despite one's partner(s) being tired.
Would you like some coffee and a muffin before bed?
by folken0 July 13, 2011
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Coffiend

Noun: 1. Someone who drinks coffee like there is no tomorrow; 2. Someone who cannot function without coffee.
Person 1: Isn't that like your eleventh cup of coffee today??

Person 2: Twelfth.

Person 1: Dude. You're a coffiend.
by Dr. Awesome Ph.D. July 18, 2012
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Coffee cup philosopher

A person who recites the sayings from coffee cups and acts like they have figured out the meaning of life
by Livinthelife May 31, 2015
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Coffee talk

Coffe talk- things not important enough for a biography, yet too important for text.
Let’s save this for coffee talk
by Realcoffeetalk June 24, 2018
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coffee chats

Person A: "I'm going to reach out to my favorite startup founder to hear her insight and to develop a friendship"

Person B: "You should invite her out for a cup of coffee. Coffee chats are both casual and professional. But don't go where they play elevator music."
by Priyana July 22, 2018
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