Captain Vagina

A man loudly claiming to be a feminist who will fight gallantly in arguing women's issues that have nothing to do with him, often for the sole purpose of getting sex. Very often beta male types.

He's just playing Captain Vagina because he has no other way of getting laid

by Psychedelichousewife February 9, 2017

Captain Kirk's Vulcan Shocker

Just like the Vulcan Shocker (two in the pink, two in the stink) with Captain Kirk's gentle thumb on the clit.

While I jacked him off, he gave be the Captain Kirk's Vulcan Shocker.

by cutiebatooty March 21, 2010

captain obvious

A phrase quite obviously inspired by John Madden. Contrary to popular belief, Captain Obvious is capable of flying but is afraid to, so he drives around the country in an RV, constantly on the lookout for blatantly obvious things to explain to the general public.

Buffalo trails New England by three at the two minute warning. When we return, that means Buffalo will have two minutes left to try to score. A field goal will tie the game. A touchdown will put Buffalo ahead. If Buffalo scores with any time left on the clock, New England will have a chance to score. If Buffalo kicks a field goal, a field goal will be enough for New England to win the game. If Buffalo scores a touchdown, New England will need a touchdown to win the game. Unless Buffalo misses the extra point, in which case New England can tie the game with a field goal following Buffalo's field goal. Of course, any time remaining will give Buffalo another chance to score and go ahead. Oh, and I've talked for so long that the game is now over. I don't think Buffalo scored. Now if you'll excuse me I need to attend to my, "ahem", other civic duties by driving around the country in my ridiculous RV, alerting the American public that gas costs more than it did last year, there are 50 stars on the U.S. flag (same as the number of states!!), Bill Clinton had a fling with an intern IN THE OVAL OFFICE, and I am the most colossal jackass in the history of RV-driving douchebags ever to announce pro football games on a level far below the intelectual capacity of a first trimester fetus conceived via incest. Until next Monday Night, with Al Michaels, this is Captain Obvious.

by anonymous Jim August 8, 2006

Captain Morgan That Shit

When you do the Captain Morgan Stance at random times and in random places usually for pictures.

Kristin: Hey Bailey look an old wooden boat here by the Dredge in Sumpter, ID.
Bailey: I'm going to Captain Morgan That Shit!!!!

by It's Bailey Bitch!!! January 19, 2009

Captain Obvious

a person who states the obvoius as if nobody knew it already

Thank you very much Captain Obvious.

by Light Joker March 18, 2007

Captain Price dat Hoe

(In Reference to the Captain Price in Call of Duty 4)
When you do a bitch, and you weren't satisfied, so the next morning you call in a Air Strike on her house/condo/apartment.

Shit holmes! Here come the Gunships, that guys gonna Captain Price dat Hoe across the street!

by Captain Price Himself March 21, 2008

Plate Captain

Slang for waiter, as used by Zaphod Beeblebrox

"Hand me the rap-rod, plate captain"

by Me April 9, 2004