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The Alabaster Parakeet

The insignia for the Order of the same name. The origin of the parakeet is one of the fundamental story in the shaping of the Order. The founder, R.M.M. Swigberry-Smythe II, is known to be descended from several families (the name Swigberry is an interesting story, but beyond the scope of this text). The most influential to the shaping of the Order is undoubtedly the Montagues, particularly Giambattista Montague. He was an eccentric Italian merchant/explorer in the 18th century who enjoyed collecting all manner of things from the countires he traveled to (his entire collection is thought to have been large enough to fill over half of the British Museum!) He also had several hundred acres of land, on which he kept all manner of animals, mostly birds. His favourite of all was a parakeet named Zipporah. Zipporah (or Old Zippy as he is known to Order members) was an extremly intelligent bird, who could perfrom all manner of tricks, even doing simple maths! When Zippy died age 68, Montague commissioned a statue of Zippy to be carved in alabaster as a centrepiece for his formal garden. Swigberry-Smythe was so moved my this story, he decided to create a group where eccentric upper-class like himself could meet and share interests, in memory of his ancestor and his beloved bird. And so, on September the 19th, 1915, he and 50 others from around the world met at his mansion in the first gathering of The Order of The Alabaster Parakeet. The rest, as they say, is history.
by Thelonius Egbert Quagmire September 19, 2003
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paraphrase

To lie make shit up to your advantage
I had to take my car home to paraphrase would be Dad kicked me out.
by Dadthedick September 24, 2017
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paraphilia

Scientific term of a sexual fantasy/ attraction beyond what society sees as normal. Also known as sexual perversion or deviation. Usually comes from childhood abuse, anti-socialism, depression, etc.
Fetishes, sado-masochism, anal, and other disturbing shit use your imagination.
by RANDOM DUDE November 22, 2004
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Parachute

The male masturbation technique of carefully selecting three of the softest tissues, stacking them on on top of the other, and inserting them over the head of one's penis at climax.

The added space between the head and the tissues creates a parachute-like shape, which is crucial so as to catch the cum without sticking.

This method was developed by an extremely talented young man, and is very convenient - one can simply wipe, throw away the tissues, making clean-up a non-issue.
Bro: Yo, my mom needed to buy a new carpet because I jerk off so much onto it. It was most embarrassing.

Other Bro: Dude, just buy some tissues use a parachute!

Bro: Man, you're so smart, I wish other people knew this trick!
by halpwr July 8, 2010
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Parachute

The best band in the entire world. They make great music and are smoking hot.
Dude did you go to the Parachute concert last night? They were banging!
by loveyoux3 December 6, 2009
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parakeet

Resting your cock and balls on someone's shoulder.
Joe took his cock and balls out, rested them on his girlfriends shoulder and told her she had a pretty parakeet.
by Texas Sucks August 29, 2005
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The Dance of The Drunken Parakeet

When you try to pet a Blue (or any other type) Parakeet and it tries to bite/peck you. First, the parakeet opens its beak; then, it follows your finger around; and lastly, it lunges for you. This act gets its name from the inebriated appearance of the bird. (swaying from side to side)
Frenchie performs The Dance of The Drunken Parakeet every night for free.
by Shawn B. January 15, 2007
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