The day you and your partner get on some porn of both of your choice and both get yourself off using your own hands for a wank or mouth
Mutual wank day. 7th February
Mutual wank day. 7th February
by anonymous February 6, 2024

What did you do this weekend?
I had a wank in church.
Ok...
Yeah, the priest wasn't too happy but he saw a choir boy and did the same.
I had a wank in church.
Ok...
Yeah, the priest wasn't too happy but he saw a choir boy and did the same.
by Baconwound August 9, 2022

a nigel danger wank
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Nigel was in his bedroom and he shouted downstairs, Mum(deceased and rotten) call the fucking police there's a madman with a set of steak knives hacking me to pieces. As soon as nigel heard her scream he dropped his trousers and commenced the danger wank. As nigel heard mummy stomp up the stairs nigel knew he had to be quick so he upped the pace, as nigel heard her stumble on the top step, which bought him some time. Unfortunately nigel timed his finish badly. As nigels mum barged through the door armed with a rolling pin nigel chugged all over mummy. nigel spent the evening in A&E with concusion.
Share definition
Nigel was in his bedroom and he shouted downstairs, Mum(deceased and rotten) call the fucking police there's a madman with a set of steak knives hacking me to pieces. As soon as nigel heard her scream he dropped his trousers and commenced the danger wank. As nigel heard mummy stomp up the stairs nigel knew he had to be quick so he upped the pace, as nigel heard her stumble on the top step, which bought him some time. Unfortunately nigel timed his finish badly. As nigels mum barged through the door armed with a rolling pin nigel chugged all over mummy. nigel spent the evening in A&E with concusion.
by mrs tosser October 7, 2025

by Freeboy March 10, 2023

A challenge of wanking during an advert break and climaxing before your television programme returns. The ability to do so can vary depending on the content and length of the adverts.
by Mottymania May 9, 2019

You at the end of the day when the gig has finished and all the pretty girls have gone home with their handsome boyfriends to have it off and you're in a cheap Travelodge hotel room all lonely and trying to imagine yourself with those girls by having it off with yourself (masturbating). Sadly, it rarely helps the situation and you end up more depressed than before.
The gig has ended and all the pretty girls have gone home with their boyfriends and I'm here having a lonely wank in a Travelodge. So depressing.
by TheFunnyGuy88 June 30, 2022

The insertion of your finger or object into your rectum whilst masturbating / jerking off, to increase pleasure while watching pornography or sexually stimulating broadcast material to enhance the experience, either on television or vvia internet streaming on computer, smartphone or tablet.
He was so aroused by the two lesbians performing cullingus on each other on late-night television, he couldn't resist giving himself a big telly pokey bum wank.
by Mackem Beefy September 19, 2021
