Jerk

Noun. An idiot or stupid person. An insensitive, selfish, ignorant, cocky person who is inconsiderate and does stupid things.

"You're such a JERK for leaving me at the mall with no ride home!"

by x8drea8x August 3, 2005

Jerk Off Condom

An off brand, damaged, or expired condom that you would not feel safe using for sex but could still be used to jerk off into.

Man: Did you bang Amie last night or what, dude?

Dude: Hell yeah, I tore that pussy up. I was all out of condoms though so I had to grab one from your drawer.

Man: Shit, you'd better buy that slut some plan B and get your dick tested...the only thing in that drawer were jerk off condoms.

by iandiablo April 1, 2011

jerk it out

to go crazy. to not care what other people think about you.

person 1:way to jerk it out!
person 2:yeah i know!

by Jessica February 23, 2005

Jerk

The kind of guy most girls ACTUALLY want when they say they want a Nice Guy.

Jerks are selfish, manipulative bastards who see women as little more then sexual conquests to brag about to their buddies or mere objects that are there for their personal pleasure. As to ensure the post-sex breakup will be in their favor, Jerks often play the "sensative guy" early on so the girl will make most of the moves on HIM, and after he's done with her and dumps her for some other girl just like her, he can make it look like she's at fault for coming on too strong, and consequently she'll take him back if he chooses to return for seconds.

Typically are/were Frat Boys, Jocks, and Preps in school.

"Yeah, Billy's a real Jerk the way he used Tricia like that. Can't believe she bought his crap though."

by ShadowD May 18, 2005

After-Jerk

The period after you jerk-off and u have cum all on ur hands and possibly yourself. And at this point u chose an activity that calms u down after ur session

Dude durrin my after-jerk i decide to watch some Spongebob

by boooooooosssssssss May 14, 2010

clean and jerk

A two part process of showering (clean) and masturbating (jerk). The clean does not necessarily come before the jerk, in fact more times than not the jerk precedes the clean. The engaging party often feels a sense of accomplishment upon completion of the clean and jerk as they have killed two birds with one stone.

Person 1: Hey man you about ready to go?
Person 2: Not yet dude, I'm gonna hop in the shower and clean and jerk before we leave.
Person 1: Well make it a quickie cause we gotta be there in like 20 minutes.

by Tony "The Situation" Simmons January 19, 2010

jerkoff-mobile

A very complex machine utilizing a combination of torsional motion and varying stresses and strains, implemented by a complex system of pulleys and hydraulic levers. The system, operating at an astronomical 72% efficiency, is perfect for thermodynamic calculations, maximizing the output of the internal combustion engine, cooking eggs, and jerking off chodes.

Dude1) "Did you finish calibrating the hydrolic pressure meter on the jerkoff-mobile?"

Dude2) "No, but I busted a giant load..."

by Brooks Brothers February 2, 2007