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excuses are like asses

phrase used by "hip" gym and history teachers. "excuses are like asses"... if the coach is particularly bright, he will finish the phrase: "excuses are like asses, everyones got one and they all stink"
"But coach - i have a good reason!!"

"excuses are like asses billy... like asses!"
by Jake Jarmel May 21, 2004
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excitement

What I explored with your mother last night. She enjoyed it.
Your mother always comes to me for a little excitement.
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aboriginal excuse

Da lame-a** "hardship-justification" retort of, "Well, the natives in the jungle don't have any ___, but THEY seem to manage just fine, so quit yer whinin'!" dat is impatiently/insensitively snorted at someone who is complaining/objecting about a particular inadequacy in his present environment; i.e., a lack/insufficiency of such basic-to-reasonably-tolerable-living things as toys/entertainment, air-conditioning, transportation, palatable-to-him food, etc. Often this arrogant reasoning is totally invalid, of course, since like as not whatever disagreeable condition dat is being objected to is indeed unacceptably harsh or distressing, and thus should indeed be remedied or alleviated... just because some backwoods primitives residing thousand of miles away happen to live a certain way usually has nothing whatever to do with what is reasonable for everyday life in a civilized world, especially with modern technology (one should seldom use da "Think how hard/thin our dirt-poor ancestors had to live!" excuse, either) and assistance-programs dat will often provide for these types of basic-comfort needs.
The infamous/hypocritical "Sheriff Joe" --- who has since been convicted of multiple catastrophic financial and human-rights atrocities --- used to carry the "aboriginal excuse" concept to a whole new level of brutal mistreatment: complained to about the 110-degree-plus temps at his prison's infamous tent-city, he once said, "Well, it's 120 degrees in Iraq, and our soldiers are living in tents, and they didn't commit any crimes, so shut your mouths!" Again, of course, this is a totally invalid argument --- just because servicemen sometimes have to endure severe conditions, that does not have anything to do with what is reasonable for the rest of us to withstand under fairly-ordinary circumstances.
by QuacksO December 29, 2019
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Excuse

Shortened form of excuse me for lazy people.
Excuse, I want to get by!
by NoComprendo June 12, 2018
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Universal slut excuse

The excuse that EVERY slut uses for being a whore and sleeping with someone else's man.
"If you were taking care of your man, he wouldn't be cheating on you with me".

"oh, the Universal slut excuse , classic. "
by 84hf84ujfjj October 19, 2008
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excuses are like asses

A phrase that explains that everyone has an excuse for their mistakes, problems etc.
Excuses are like asses, everyone has them (except some gimps).
by Didda Tinkle May 24, 2004
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excite

Excite: The level of excitement ranked below excited .
Or: You are either to lazy to type out excited or just wanted to sound stupid.
Ex: Person A: Hey I can come over tomorrow

Person B: Good, I am excite.
by Asscrack November 21, 2016
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