dad

someone that will be back one day with milk (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

*kid*:mommy whens dad coming back with milk
*mom* only in your dreams

by joemamajoe January 30, 2020

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Dad

The #1 comment when you see your main hoe or side chick's picture on instagram. If you want a girl call u daddy , comment

"Dad😍😍😍😂😤😤😤🔥🔥🔥😘😘😘🔥❤️😍🔥🔥❤️❤️🔥⛪️⛪️⛪️⛪️⛪️💦💦💦👎🏾🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾☠️☠️☠️"

Liam: Did you see Paige and Elly's insta?
Kyle: Dads looking good. Go comment

Liam: Say less

by Ugly_____God November 22, 2016

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dad peen

When you get older your sick doesn't erect as much as it use to. Your foreskin gets saggy and your balls hang low.

Going down on a dad peen is nasty. Foreskin so sloppy I could use it as a sleeping bag.

by BBPOSKA August 19, 2019

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Not your dad

I'm not half-a-retard so how could you possibly be my father?

A retard "I'm not your dad!"

Hym "Why? Am I drooling on myself or something? Do I look like half-a-retard to you? Because what are you fucking idiots going to do without me other than get roast by the climate change? Your ass is going to be a popsicle the day after I die from brain fluid."

by Hym Iam February 10, 2025

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step-dad

A cowardice loser who your mom made the mistake of sleeping with after divorcing your equally terrible biological father. Your mom will slowly begin to care about your step-dad more than she cares about you and will completely ignore, or even take his side when he decides to project his own insecurities onto you by relentlessly bullying and trying to make you feel bad about yourself for years. Your entire family will see your step-dad as a good guy and the perfect substitute for your abusive biological father, when little do they know, he causes you the same amount of emotional distress that your biological father used to. Your step-dad will also make you feel like your problems simply don't exist and will call you an attention whore if you even dare to mention or express any type of mental health problems you have in front of him. And the worst part is that you will have to deal with this feeble excuse for a human being until you are old enough and financially stable enough to live on your own.

I hope my mother divorces my step-dad someday

by wise mystical tree October 4, 2022

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Dad

A man possibly woman that didn't pull out in time so he left you because you're a complete accident that no even you mother loves. That's why she "dad's" have the audacity to leave you when you're 2. So if you still have one remember that he or she (who knows) absolutely hates you.

Dad left to have sex with a frog

by Hail.za.queen June 6, 2021

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